Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is believed by some that the crucial
school
curriculum is
History
while others thought that learning subjects like
Sinence
Correct your spelling
Science

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and
Technology
are more helpful for the future in
modern
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the modern

The noun phrase modern world seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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world
. In my opinion, studying Science and
Technology
have
more
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a more

The noun phrase more positive impact seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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positive impact on today lifestyle even though knowing historical events is good for learning to improve from
past
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the past
a past

The noun phrase past mistake seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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mistake and inspire
the
Correct article usage
apply

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famous invention. On the one hand,
children
can learn how to avoid the making same mistakes from the past by learning
History
.
In other words
, by teaching the story of
World
War I & II,
children
can learn how to live harmoniously within different races and how to avoid happening the same things over and over again.
For instance
, people
noesday
Correct your spelling
today

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are living peacefully in
cosmopolitan
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the cosmopolitan

The noun phrase cosmopolitan world seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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world
thanks to having knowledge of the past.
Moreover
, adding
History
as the
school
coursework is an advantage because
children
can inspire by
the
Correct article usage
apply

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past victory and motivate
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply

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to become one themselves.
For example
, students can probably find their interest in
creation
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the creation

The noun phrase creation seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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of new
equiptments
Correct your spelling
equipment

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from the tale of
airplane
Change the spelling
aeroplane

The spelling of airplane is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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invention. On the
contray
Correct your spelling
contrary

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, teaching Science in
school
is
an
Change the article
apply

It appears that the article an is unnecessary before the adjective essential. Consider making a change.

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essential because the scientists are involved in
the
Correct article usage
a

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major role to save the environment and mankind.
For instance
,
the
Correct article usage
apply

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vaccines and drugs are in demand urgently during
covid
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a covid
the covid

The noun phrase covid outbreak seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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outbreak in order to save
many
Replace the quantifier
much

It appears that the quantifier many does not fit with the uncountable noun life. Consider changing it.

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life
Replace the word
lives

The word life doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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and to resume
normal
Add an article
a normal

The noun phrase normal lifestyle seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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lifestyle, as the result, the nature of
virus
Correct article usage
the virus

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are experimented
and
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with and

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tested to get the vaccine by scientists.
Finally
,
children
should learn
Technology
in
school
in order to adapt
with
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the latest technologies of the
world
trends. As the
world
becomes full of technological devices, students should familiar with them so that they don't have any problem using them. To conclude, I mostly agreed that course like science and
technology
are more
importance
Replace the word
important

The word importance doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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than
history
since the
world
need
Change the verb form
needs

The plural verb need does not appear to agree with the singular subject the world. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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more scientists to maintain the ecosystem and well being of human.
Submitted by ms.hayhman on

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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