IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is positive or negative development?

#businesses #emphasise #products #development
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, the competition among the
business
Use synonyms
 organization is increasing day by day that
business
Use synonyms
 sectors can not avoid developing their
product
Use synonyms
 for making them different from other competitors. In their advertising, businesses are trying to show the different ideas of their
product
Use synonyms
 to customers. From my point of view, it is a positive development for many reasons that will be outlined in detail before the conclusion is reached.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are many competitions in the
business
Use synonyms
sector
Use synonyms
 which separate in many categories
such
Linking Words
 as phone
market
Use synonyms
, food
market
Use synonyms
 or vehicle
market
Use synonyms
, while
business
Use synonyms
 owners prefer to gain profit from their operation more than loss. So, the expectation of
business
Use synonyms
 owners makes the
business
Use synonyms
sector
Use synonyms
 becomes enthusiastic and develops a
product
Use synonyms
 to make it different from other
product
Use synonyms
 in the same
market
Use synonyms
 and become the
first
Linking Words
 position in their
market
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, I think that
this
Linking Words
 process is a positive development for many reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the competition of new
product
Use synonyms
 is extremely competitive that make every
business
Use synonyms
 find a new solution to develop a
product
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, advertising can encourage economic growth when the businesses
sector
Use synonyms
 issues advertising of a new
product
Use synonyms
 to show a different feature of the
product
Use synonyms
 that makes customers need to concentrate on the qualities before buying a new
product
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, developing new products nowadays and publishing in a public place or other media Chanel become a factor that other sectors concentrate to both of
product
Use synonyms
 material and the idea of products. In conclusion, the
business
Use synonyms
sector
Use synonyms
 and advertising are related to each other and gain loss from other sectors.
Submitted by palmpppm on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
What to do next:
Look at other essays: