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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many people think that nowadays people are being subjected to more and more pressure in their work, and thus are having less and less time to relax. What is your opinion?

In modern society, especially in big cities, undoubtedly hard
work
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 has become a very important feature of ordinary
people
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’s everyday life. It seems that many
people
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 are under the impression that their
work
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 is becoming more pressing and urgent, and
thus
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 they sacrifice more and more
leisure
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time
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. In the
first
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 place, with the rapid development of science and technology,
work
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 today is more demanding than it used to be.
For example
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, college graduates nowadays have to master English, computer science and driving skills before they can find decent jobs.
People
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 have to spend more
time
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 acquiring new techniques and skills. And their spare
time
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 tends to be fully occupied, not with
leisure
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pursuit
Fix the agreement mistake
pursuits
show examples
, but with
work
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-related pursuits. In the
second
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 place, competition is becoming more intense. Many
people
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 feel anxious that they may be “laid-off” if they can’t
work
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 as hard as others. And they
also
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 feel at a disadvantage before new graduates.
Therefore
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, it is understandable that
people
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 keep themselves involved in intensely hard
work
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 in order to preserve their positions. In my opinion, the worst aspect of
this
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 phenomenon is that the huge pressure of
work
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 will gradually affect
people
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’s mental health. Excessively hard
work
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 means that
people
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 can never get rid of the fatigue of their
work
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, even in their
leisure
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time
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.
This
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 means that they can not enjoy a normal life. In a word, in modern society overwork is stealing our
leisure
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time
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.
however
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, I believe
this
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 problem will be settled eventually with the development of science and technology.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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