IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

. In many countries, the number of people choosing to live by themselves is increasing rapidly in recent years. Why is this happening? Is this a positive and negative development for society?

#countries #people #years #development #society
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Considering
intensified
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the intensified
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 competition in job markets ,there has been a
dramatical
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dramatic
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 rise in those who tend to lead an independent life.
Accordingly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 are more
skillful
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skilful
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 and knowledgeable , which implies the positive movement Many jobs are not available though graduates have
higher
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a higher
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degree
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degrees
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, which means they need to acquire a plethora of specialized information and vocational training. In simple words, self-reliance motivates them to willingly engage in study and force
to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
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 achieve bodacious results.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 can not only enhance pragmatic skills but
also
Linking Words
 frames themselves
in tolerance
Correct your spelling
intolerance
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 that
know
Change the verb form
knows
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 how to deal with particular situations. A salient example can be seen in independent
creavity
Correct your spelling
creativity
 that make them a powerful asset for the employer or to their business. Briefly,
people
Use synonyms
Correct pronoun usage
who favor
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favor
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favour
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 living alone are climbing quickly.
Although
Linking Words
 many
people
Use synonyms
 argue that independent life is attributed
from
Change preposition
to
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 selfishness, it still presents
advantageous
Replace the word
advantages
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 for family and society. Those who isolated themselves from working together in order to decrease the burden they place. If being capable of meeting their own needs with the help of technology, they don’t have to depend on others for help.
Instead
Linking Words
 of being a burden, they lighten the load of others. Whether living independently
rising
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torising
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 remain positive or negative, it benefits both individual and society. While it allows us to live the way we
love
Correct your spelling
live
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, it
also
Linking Words
 hurt mental illness
such
Linking Words
 as stress, depression…
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, as human being alters promptly,
this
Linking Words
 lifestyle is
foundation
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the foundation
a foundation
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 to earn bodacious things.
Submitted by thanh.jenny on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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