The pie charts illustrates the number of sales in different spheres of online shopping in New Zealand during 10 years.

The pie charts

illustrates

Change the verb form

illustrate

show examples

the number of sales in different spheres of online shopping in New Zealand

during

Change preposition

over

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10 years.

Overall

Linking Words

, consumers in travel and clothes categories

were

Unnecessary verb

apply

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significant

Replace the word

significantly

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decreased over

period

Add an article

the period

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In contrast

Linking Words

, the popularity of books, films and music

were

Correct subject-verb agreement

was

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raised by the end of the period. Looking at the details,the trade of film and music started from 21%,which has

considerable

Replace the word

considerably

show examples

grown to 33% per year. Production of books reached a low point of 19% in 2003 and a peak of 22% in 2013. Meanwhile, the most popular sector

was travel

Change the verb form

was traveled

was traveling

show examples

approximately 36% in 2003.

Following

Linking Words

this

Add a comma

,this

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has

Unnecessary verb

apply

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dropped slightly to 29% by the end of

period

Add an article

the period

show examples

Similarly

Linking Words

, the consumption of clothes during 10 years declined dramatically from 24% in 2003 to 16% in 2013

Sonyak241205Tue Nov 30 2021

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

127 words

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The pie charts illustrates the number of sales in different spheres of online shopping in New Zealand during 10 years.

Social media has completely changed the way family and friends communicate with each other. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

In some countries around the world, men and women are having children late in life. What are the reasons for this development? What are the effects on society and family life? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think all lawbreakers should be sent to prison, while others think there are better alternatives for those whose crimes are minor, such as making them do work for the local community. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?