It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is suggested that school-age children should only learn domestic

history

rather than world

history

However

, I disagree with

this

point of view and believe that both should be learned at schools. On the one hand, it is imperative to learn subjects related to local

history

because it can help teenagers

Verb problem

apply

show examples

cultivate a sense of belonging and pride. To be specific, knowing historical stories and living habitats of the past generations can deepen students' understanding of their cultures and create a special bond between them and their ancestors, which can strengthen youngsters' cultural identity.

Moreover

, juveniles would be proud of their nation and government after studying the process of economic flourishing and technological developments,

thus

becoming more responsible for society and concerned about the environment.

On the other hand

, learning about the

history

of other countries has its own benefits. World

history

informs us of different cultures and lifestyles of different nationalities, which is essential for juveniles to assimilate into the global community and become successful in

this

globalized village. Specifically, understanding diverse

history

can not only help youths

Verb problem

apply

show examples

form a mutual understanding of different ethnic groups but

also

encourage adolescents to think outside the box and develop creativity. People equipped with a well-rounded perspective can consider problems from different angles,

consequently

fostering better problem-solving skills, which is one the most vital

contributor

Fix the agreement mistake

contributors

show examples

to personal achievements. From the analysis above, I believe it is equally important for students to know about local and world

history

because both of them

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

their own advantages.

Submitted by lslethan on Wed Dec 01 2021

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task achievement

Ensure that your introduction clearly presents your viewpoint and that your essay sufficiently addresses the question posed. You should either align with the given statement or refute it, stating to what extent you agree or disagree. Keep your argument consistent throughout your essay.

task achievement

Provide a balanced approach when discussing both sides of an argument but remember to return to your own thesis, emphasizing your stance towards the end of the essay.

coherence and cohesion

Strive to maintain a clear logical structure throughout your essay. Use linking words effectively to connect sentences and paragraphs, ensuring that the reader can easily follow your line of reasoning.

coherence and cohesion

Introduce concrete examples to strengthen your main points. Each paragraph should include specific details that illustrate and support the claims you make.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

255 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

heritage
cultural identity
ancestry
traditions
globalization
empathy
contemporary issues
integrate
perspective
civilization
diversity
innovations
historical significance
nationalism
cosmopolitanism
historiography
geopolitical

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It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some cultures, children are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

some people say that the main environment problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. others say that there are more important environmental problems. discuss both views and give your opinion.

An increasing number of advertisements on TV aim at children. What are the effects of television advertising? Should television advertising be controlled?

Nowadays children spend more time playing computer games than doing sports. Why is it happening? Does it have a positive or negative effect on their development?