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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that children should learn how to compete, but others think that children should be taught to cooperate to become more useful adults. Express some reasons for both views and give your own opinions

#people #children #adults
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It is a highly debatable issue whether
children
Use synonyms
 should learn to compete or
co-operate
Correct your spelling
cooperate
show examples
 in order to become productive citizens of society. In my opinion,
both
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competition
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 and
cooperation
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 are necessary virtues of
life
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 and
children
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 should learn
both
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. What is more important is to teach
children
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 where they need to compete and where they need to cooperate.
Competition
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 is very important in
life
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.
Children
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 can be taught to compete when they prepare for the exams or when they play solo
sports
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 like athletics. They have to learn to compete to excel in studies or win a race or any athletic event.
This
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 virtue comes
handy
Change preposition
in handy
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 in adult
life
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. For example, when they do any business, they have to compete with other businessmen to succeed in business. Definitely, successful businessmen are useful adults in society
On the other hand
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, there are many fields where
cooperation
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 is needed.
Children
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 can be taught
this
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 virtue in the
sports
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 field when they play
team
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sports
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 like cricket and hockey. They can
also
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 be taught
cooperation
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 when teachers give them group assignments in studies.
This
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 virtue
also
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 makes them useful adults because they have to cooperate in many fields of
life
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.
For instance
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, when they work as scientists to research the treatment of diseases like cancers and AIDS
then
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 it can never be a one-man show. It has to be a joint effort. Software developers
also
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 have to work as a
team
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 to bring benefits to all of us who use technology
nowaday
Correct your spelling
nowadays
show examples
There are
also
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 situations where
both
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competition
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 and
cooperation
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 are needed simultaneously.
For example
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, when
children
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 do
team
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sports
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, they learn to cooperate with their
team
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 members and at the same time they learn to compete with the opposite
team
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.
Similarly
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, in adult
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life
Add a comma
life,
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 they have to learn to cooperate with their country-men to compete with those of other countries. We all know that today’s era is highly competitive and the big planet Earth has shrunk to a global village.
For example
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, Indian auto industries have merged to compete with the German and Japanese industries. So,
competition
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 and
cooperation
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 go hand in hand. To put it in a nutshell, I pen down saying that,
it is clear that
Linking Words
children
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 should be taught
both
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 – to compete
as well as
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 cooperate and more importantly where in
life
Use synonyms
 they have to apply these attributes.
Submitted by vivek16793 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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