IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You recently applied for two separate jobs. Both have chosen to hire you, but you must write a letter to one of them explaining why you are unable to take the position. Include in your letter: – An apology – An explanation of your situation

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to apologise for not being able to accept the position offered by your
institute
Use synonyms
. I am grateful to you for allowing me to join your organisation as a lecturer;
however
Linking Words
, I could not accept
this
Linking Words
job
Use synonyms
 position.
Although
Linking Words
 I have been waiting for
this
Linking Words
 golden opportunity to work at your
institute
Use synonyms
, I have accepted another
job
Use synonyms
 offer which is more convenient for my career.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I deeply regret if it causes any inconvenience to you. I would like to explain the reasons for accepting another
job
Use synonyms
 as a nursing coordinator at a University. It would take only 15 minutes to reach me at work, and
also
Linking Words
 offers me a good
job
Use synonyms
 position which would assist me in getting a placement in a foreign country which is my major goal of life.
Besides
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
, I would get a chance to visit other countries
along with
Linking Words
 a holiday
pacakage
Correct your spelling
package
 every year.
Hence
Linking Words
, these attractive opportunities tempt me to join
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 was a difficult decision for me because your
institute
Use synonyms
 was ready to give me various benefits in the form of early promotion and high wages. I am well aware
about
Change the preposition
of
show examples
 the reputation of your educational
institute
Use synonyms
, thereby, looking forward to
work
Change the verb form
working
show examples
 with you in future. Thank you for your time and consideration. Yours faithfully, Amandeep Kaur

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The letter effectively includes an apology and a clear explanation of the situation, fulfilling the task requirements well.
coherence cohesion
While the letter flows well, consider adding transitional phrases to further improve the coherence between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The letter has a clear and logical structure, making it easy to follow the writer's points.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriately formal and polite, fitting the context of the letter.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph focuses on a single idea, contributing to the overall clarity of the letter.
task achievement
The response is complete and addresses the task fully, including an apology and an explanation.
task achievement
The writing tone is polite and respectful, which is suitable for an apology letter.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gratitude
  • regret
  • unfortunately
  • opportunity
  • decision
  • career goals
  • personal circumstances
  • alignment
  • difficult choice
  • future opportunities
  • stay connected
What to do next:
Look at other essays: