IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

People generally know that the environment is important. However, most individuals still don’t take responsibilities to protect the environment. Why is this? What should be done to encourage people to protect the environment?

#people #environment #individuals #don’t #responsibilities
Most individuals
is
Change the verb form
are
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 aware that how much the
environment
mean
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means
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 to us.
Nonetheless
, not everyone is actively playing their
parts
Fix the agreement mistake
part
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 in reserving the
environment
.
This
mainly
Add a missing verb
is mainly
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 due to the lack of insight on the global
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 issues in each person. In order to tackle
this
 problem,
government
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the government
show examples
 should implement laws and organise
programmes
 to raise awareness.
Individual
Fix the agreement mistake
Individuals
show examples
 are passive in participating in activities that involve
in
Change preposition
apply
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saving our
environment
 because they do not see the big picture. Despite our planet
is
Wrong verb form
being
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 endangered by massive human activities, most people daily life is not directly affected yet.
Although
these information
Change the determiner
this information
show examples
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 available on different media, the message
do
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does
show examples
 not reach every citizen effectively. For
instances
Fix the agreement mistake
instance
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,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
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 of television
programmes
 focus on entertaining shows while boring documentary TV
programmes
 on
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 are often ignored. In
this
 case, the
government
 plays an essential role in raising people’s awareness
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 environmental issues.
Firstly
, the
government
 can
imposed
Wrong verb form
impose
show examples
 rules
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 different media to ensure
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
 news updates about the environmental problems reached the community thoroughly. An example is to make awareness videos and make it compulsory to play them in the cinema before
movie
Correct article usage
the movie
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 starts. On top of that,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 can organise related
programmes
 that involve all
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
. While recycling waste is one of the best
way
Change to a plural noun
ways
show examples
 every
individuals
Change to a singular noun
individual
show examples
 can practice to contribute to our
environment
, the
government
 can make it mandatory or subsidise those who recycle. In conclusion, every person in the community has
Correct article usage
a responsibility
show examples
responsibility
Replace the word
responded
show examples
 in defending our
environment
 and should
work
Add the preposition
forwork
show examples
 hand
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 hand with the
government
 in order to make our planet a cleaner and safer place to stay.
Submitted by callykohkkl1993 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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