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Writing Samples /
Band 5

The detailed description about crime will affect the people and cause many social problems. Some people say that the media should be strictly controlled. Do you agree or disagree?

#description #crime #people #media
It is often argued that
indepth
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in-depth
in depth
explaination
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explanation
 about criminal activities can cause
disturnbance
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disturbance
disturbances
 among the
people
 leading to many issues at society level. It is considered by some that publishing must be monitored. I completely agree with the given statement and there are two reasons why I think so and they will be explained in the
next
 few paragraphs.
To begin
 with,
anti social
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anti-social
show examples
 activities promote fear and
unstability
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instability
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. It is a well-known fact that any mishappening in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society scare
individulas
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individuals
specially
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especially
show examples
 children and women not only in the urban areas but
also
 in the rural localities.
Although
such
 incidence occur rarely and
people
 take precautionary
meausure
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measures
measure
 to combat
such
 happenings. To
illustarte
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illustrate
, firing in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public places during broad
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daylight
show examples
day light
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daylight
show examples
 mentally disturbs
people
af
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of
 all ages for a long period of time.
Therefore
,
such
 negative and
life threatening
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life-threatening
show examples
 events have a detrimental effect on
people
's life.
Secondly
, Violent activities
disturbs
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disturb
show examples
 communal harmony in the region. It is a proven fact that during homicides and genocides negative thoughts and wrong
perception
Fix the agreement mistake
perceptions
show examples
 establish in the communities leading to frustration and misunderstandings in the individuals especially in the developed economies. Hatred
previals
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prevails
 over peace and brotherhood for a while.
For instance
, Black
people
 in Australia
are often attacked
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have often attacked
show examples
 due to discrimination and
as a
result
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,result
show examples
 many Asian countries have
wrong
Change the article
the wrong
show examples
perception
Fix the agreement mistake
perceptions
show examples
 towards Australian citizens and
this
Correct your spelling
in turn
show examples
inturn
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in turn
show examples
 leads to more hatred towards white
people
 . In short, societies starts discrimination against each other. In conclusion, I
Strongly
Correct your spelling
strongly
show examples
 affirm that newspaper
agecies
Correct your spelling
agencies
 and media have an imperative role to play by showing minimum content of the crime and the authorities must put a check and balance system in place to regulate these authorities .
Submitted by rahat on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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