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Writing Samples
Band 6

Communication has changed significantly in the last 10 years. Discuss the positive and negative impacts of this change.

In
this
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 era of technological advancements, it is widely acknowledged that changes in communication took place in the
last
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 decade, which has its own impact on
day- to -day
Correct your spelling
day-to-day
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 life. Nowadays, the debate on the topic of conveying modifications is spreading worldwide, where it seems
boon
Correct article usage
a boon
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 to some
crowd
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crowds
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while
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 others oppose it by stating its cons.
This
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 essay will elaborate on both the advantages and disadvantages of conversation variation methods. Admittedly, technology introduced many communication platforms
such
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 as social media, which has transformed how individuals interact.
For example
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, in developed countries
such
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 as the USA and Canada, people prioritize working from home and communicating through social media platforms
such
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 as Zoom, through which they organize
the
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apply
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meetings and discuss upcoming projects.
This
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 is beneficial as it saves travel time and workers can work by staying in their comfort zone.
Moreover
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, it has improved the efficiency and convenience in personal life.
For instance
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, instant messaging and video conferencing help to stay in touch with friends and family, even if people are living far from their families.
On the other hand
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, the negative impacts of
this
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 advancement cannot be denied, data privacy and the spread of misleading information an examples of the drawbacks.
In addition
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,
while
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 it increased global connectivity, it has
also
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 led to decreased face-to-face interaction that can cause distance between relations. To exemplify, a report was published in 2017, that explains that people expect quick responses, which has a negative impact on personal and professional relationships. To put it in a nutshell, every coin has two sides, and the same with communication development, as it makes life easier but has some downsides.

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task achievement
Your introduction is clear, but try to improve the clarity by making your main points stand out more.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking words to show the connection between your ideas, like 'however', 'furthermore', or 'in addition'.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph should have a clear main idea; try to make sure that each example clearly supports that idea.
task achievement
In your conclusion, summarize your main points a bit more clearly to reinforce your message.
task achievement
You have identified both positive and negative impacts of communication changes, which shows depth in your discussion.
task achievement
Your use of examples, such as social media platforms and remote work, makes your argument relatable and strong.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay structure is logical, with clear paragraphs that separate different points of discussion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Global connectivity
  • Social media platforms
  • Instant messaging
  • Video conferencing
  • Work-life balance
  • Misinformation
  • Data privacy concerns
  • Cultural homogenization
  • Language erosion
  • Real-time communication
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