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Band 5

Some people do not go directly to college but travel or work for a short time. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #college #travel #work #time
During
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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 modern
Change to a genitive case
day's
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days
Add a comma
,days
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 students
has
Change the verb form
have
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 an opportunity to earn before even completing their academic
Correct your spelling
calendar
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calender
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calendar
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 due to technology.Some individuals get employed or go
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
vacation
Add an article
a vacation
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 for a limited time rather than going to
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
college as soon.The drawbacks are more than merits since the students
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 a high chance of early marriage and dropping out of
school
Firstly
,learners who travel or work before attending college find themselves having responsibilities just by the touch of money.
This
 is because
ideally
Add a comma
,ideally
show examples
 they end up getting married.Due to the technology being prominent that they get exposed in a way they forget about education.
In addition
,just being away from
learning
Correct article usage
the learning
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 environment keep the thought of going back to
school
 away.
For example
,in 2019 the star newspapers reported that public vehicle conductors are
form
Correct your spelling
from
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 four leaves with high grades.
Therefore
,it is apparent that the exposure of not going on with schooling is high once the scholar travel or work before going to an institute.
Secondly
,dropping out of
school
 is a major consequence especially when an undergraduate has tasted money that they feel held on from earning or going for vacations.
Consequently
,they perform badly as their interest is disrupted from the usual flow of being in a learning environment,
For example
,in
Rwanda
Add a comma
,Rwanda
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 the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 published a policy in 2021 for
transition
Add an article
the transition
a transition
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 of
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a student
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student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 from secondary to university.Indeed,in the modern world comparing to
tradition
Replace the word
traditional
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 times
school
drop out
Correct your spelling
dropout
show examples
 is high and again many students in higher learning are multitasking. To sum up,the society stopped reporting immediately to university rather
go
Change preposition
than go
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 abroad or labour for a short time has led to several scholars be multitasking due to many
respossibility
Correct your spelling
responsibility
.
Submitted by Sabina Hamisi on

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • self-discovery
  • character-building
  • enhanced
  • independence
  • adaptability
  • interpersonal skills
  • open-mindedness
  • global perspective
  • delayed
  • employment prospects
  • financial burden
  • educational attainment
What to do next:
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