There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

this

modern world,one of the most conspicuous

trend

Change to a plural noun

trends

show examples

music

.The majority of the population from different nations believe that instrumental sounds have an indispensable position in our lives due to many reasons.Meanwhile,a popular belief is that conventional country tones are more important than international songs.In the following essay, I will explain my own view. It is widely accepted that the

music

industry plays a colossal role in today's world and every individual

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

it as a vital part of

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

his

her

show examples

life.I strongly agree with

this

common opinion,

furthermore

,there is a fact which is proven scientifically that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

music

has therapeutic effects.

For instance

, some researches have done by McGill

university

Change the capitalization

University

show examples

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

demonstrate

Change the verb form

demonstrates

show examples

the findings that when

surgers

Correct your spelling

surgery

surgeries

play a calm melody during surgeries the probability of success increase because a symphony is tension_free and

also

ease the pressure out.

Secondly

music

is highly appreciated for its representation of

culture

Correct article usage

the culture

show examples

and

custom

Fix the agreement mistake

customs

show examples

of a country so from

this

perspective the majority of folks claimed that traditional songs are much more momentous than overseas ones.I entirely support

this

position,

for example

,Iran has

the

Correct article usage

show examples

special style in

music

and their poems indicate the history and the civilization of that country.So,if they start to just listen to Western

music

,they will ruin and forget their past generation.So, in my opinion, every nation should

maintains

Change the verb form

maintain

show examples

its unique style in

music

. In conclusion, every sound we make is

music

and it is crucial for our existence,

although

never disremember your originality.By the way,it seems to me that in the near future youngsters can not recognize their motherland melodies.

Submitted by ghafooriarya on Sun Dec 12 2021

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Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

emotional release
cultural significance
globalization
cultural exchange
technology
preservation
cultural heritage
social cohesion
expression
consumption
production
traditional music
international music
diversity
identity

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There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Teachers think that international student exchange would be beneficial for all teenage students . Do you think its advantages outweigh its disadvantages?

Due to globalization, many countries lose their traditions and national values. Some people think it is the responsibility of governments to protect these values. Do you agree or disagree?

The continued rise in the world's population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. good quality of life. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?