Some parents believe that home schooling is more beneficial than the traditional schools. What is your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is an argument among parents about whether homeschooling is more advantageous than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
traditional schooling or not.
Although
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
homeschooled
children
Use synonyms
can be trained and taught regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
their
talents
Use synonyms
, they may lack in their future relationships and communications. The
children
Use synonyms
who are homeschooled have the chance to learn regarding their
talents
Use synonyms
and abilities and learn how to improve them. In traditional
schools
Use synonyms
, most of the teachers are using particular guidelines to teach;
therefore
Linking Words
,
children
Use synonyms
with different types of learning styles may have some difficulties in learning their lessons.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in traditional schooling teaching materials are fixed,
such
Linking Words
as mathematics, physics and physical education, and
usually
Add a comma
,usually
show examples
parents and teachers believe that some lessons,
such
Linking Words
as mathematics, carry more weight rather than others;
thus
Linking Words
for the students with different
talents
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as art may feel bad about themselves because they feel insufficient, not talented or smart enough.
Therefore
Linking Words
, when
children
Use synonyms
are homeschooled, each individual can be taught in a proper way to find out what is his or her ability and passion to improve, with no judgments, though by changing the methods of teaching and grading in traditional
schools
Use synonyms
, the problem may be solved. Alternatively,
children
Use synonyms
who attend
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
traditional
schools
Use synonyms
have the chance to socialize and learn how to communicate. When
children
Use synonyms
spend some time with their peers, they will learn how to manage their relationships with each type of personality.
Also
Linking Words
, they will be able to improve their teamwork skills. According to the nature of humans which is being social, later in life, they will need to communicate with others at work, parties and so on;
thus
Linking Words
knowing how to have a better relationship with others is a must which should be learnt
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
younger age and by experiencing different situations. All things considered, some parents believe that homeschooling is more beneficial than traditional
schools
Use synonyms
. Though
children
Use synonyms
who are homeschooled may recognize their
talents
Use synonyms
and passion easily and be able to follow them, they may confront some difficulties in their future communications. I believe, by improving the methods of teaching and grading in traditional
schools
Use synonyms
, they would be more beneficial.
Submitted by fghasemi21 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: