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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many manfactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which casues many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #products #levels #sugar #casues #health #people
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Today, high levels of
sugar
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 are contained in various kinds of food especially, manufactured food, which causes many diseases. In my opinion, sugary products should not be made expensive to stop eating them much. Many
people
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 are fond of eating them like snacks, fizzy drinks from children to adults. taking too much
sugar
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 cause sickness or disease and threaten our health.
However
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, just consuming the appropriate amount of snacks or juice lead to decreasing in our stress. Raising their price makes
people
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 hesitate to buy what they love to eat or drink.
Therefore
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, making them expensive brings
people
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 more stress and serious mental diseases.
Secondly
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,
sugar
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 functions positively in our daily life if we are careful of frequency and amount.
Sugar
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 and glucose help our work more efficient. It is demonstrated scientifically that glucose help to concentrate on working and studying.
Furthermore
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, it
also
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 plays a role that it releasing our fatigue and stress. In
this
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 way, if we are careful of eating too much, it is healthy rather than unhealthy. In conclusion, I disagree with the opinion that the cost of sugary products should be higher. Making expensive does not necessarily function as encouraging
people
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 to be healthier.
On the contrary
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, it will bring mental sick and lower working efficiency.
Submitted by nogikeyakihill55 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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