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Band 7

The only reason to work hard is to earn money.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#reason #work #money
Some individuals believe that money is the only reason to
work
 strictly. In my strong belief, it is obligatory to have full-time jobs and
work
 a lot in order to reduce your financial matters. On one hand, there are controversial perspectives heating a debate over working hard. Some humans
work
 a lot due to the fact that they want to spend less time at home because their wives and children are so noisy. Some others
persue
Correct your spelling
pursue
 a great aim and try to promote in their fields of
work
 that require working for a lot of
hours
.
For example
, a chemical engineer at Petrotech Company need to
work
 from 8:00 am to 7:00 pm to be able discover new chemical reactions and be able reach to a higher level.
However
, I would contend it is not necessary
work
 for many
hours
 a day just due to promotion because you would be definitely able to get it in a few months later.
On the other hand
, a climbing number of people need to
work
 hardly due to the fact that they encounter serious financial problems.
Therefore
, if they
work
 for longer
hours
, they will have stronger financial resources.
For example
, in the recent three months, I have increased my
work
hours
 from 7 to 9 and I witness my salary has increased by 15 percent. By way of conclusion,
this
 essay discussed the views about working hard
in addition
 to my opinion which is agreeing completely to working hard only due to earning more money.
Submitted by rmansori92 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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