Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?

#society #numbers #people

We can not deny the fact that in our modern time folk live more than a few decades ago.So,the topic of care of elderly crowd and their increase become quite popular nowadays.Let us consider

this

question more deeply.

Firstly

,I think that our

society

is able to help

elderly

Add an article

the elderly

show examples

nation.Because of fact that we have new inventions and technologies which facilitates custody of old population.

Also

,today we know more about the human body and illness than in past .So we can make concern about them improved useful.

However

,a lot of work about the prosperity of

old

Correct article usage

the old

show examples

nation

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

done ,but we could improve it.

First

and foremost ,we can not think that concerns about elderly crowd it is efforts of old nation's home only.Children and grandchildren must visit their grandparents .If they were not done it , the mental health of old people could deteriorate.

On the other hand

,we can observe that numbers of

Add an article

the family

a family

show examples

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

feel that

society

will be able to cope with the increase in the numbers of

elderly

Add an article

the elderly

show examples

community .

These

Correct determiner usage

This

show examples

society

Change the determiner

societies

show examples

are afraid that in close future they and their children do not have enough space on our planet because of the increasing of

old

Add an article

the old

show examples

public.In my opinion, these statements are not correct and are some kind of non-human.

Old

Add an article

The old

An old

show examples

crowd in the past built for

Change the pronoun

our

show examples

towns and won wars to make our life's happy and now it is our turn to protect and care for them. To draw the conclusion ,I can say that our modern

society

is able to with the increase in numbers of

old

Add an article

the old

show examples

community .In my opinion,it is our duty to care about them.

Submitted by gleblozik72 on Sun Dec 19 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

272 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
As global trade increases, many goods including those we use on a daily basis are produced in other countries and have to be transported long distance. Do the benefits of this trend outweigh the drawbacks?
Due to the advancement of transportation and technology, the world is globalised and the number of trade between two or more countries has been increasing. This situation results in mixed consequences involving advantages and disadvantages at the same time. However, iit is considered to be more advantageous with global trading systems.
5
band
Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others believe actions can be taken to bring about a change.
Human activities have indeed inflicted detrimental impacts on plants and wildlife. While some may argue that it's too late to reverse this trend, I firmly believe that there are numerous steps we can take to mitigate these effects.
5.5
band
Some people hesitate between getting a job and starting their own business. While the idea of not having a boss and working on one's own schedule may sound tempting, financial risks and stress sometimes outweigh these advantages. In your opinion what are the pros and cons of working in a company?
More and more people are thinking of starting their own business to be more independent in their everyday life, which would offer them more freedom for holidays and everything else. However, with these advantages there are also some disadvantages because of the financial risk and stress that it can have on the self-employed. But what side has more arguments?
5
band
By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilty of commiting murder.Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers.
Some folks believe that the killers should be given life imprisonment rather than a death sentence to avoid further murders in the society.I tend to disagree with this statement because of the fact that the strict decisions are needed to purify the society from criminals.There are various reasons for this argument.
4
band
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction.
punishment help children to learn, what is good and right? There are many people belive that punishment is very crucial for children to learn right and wrong at an early age. Others argue that it is not a solution. I totally disagree with this agreement.

Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

As global trade increases, many goods including those we use on a daily basis are produced in other countries and have to be transported long distance. Do the benefits of this trend outweigh the drawbacks?

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others believe actions can be taken to bring about a change.

Some people hesitate between getting a job and starting their own business. While the idea of not having a boss and working on one's own schedule may sound tempting, financial risks and stress sometimes outweigh these advantages. In your opinion what are the pros and cons of working in a company?

By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilty of commiting murder.Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers.

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction.