IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many believe that it is important to protect all wild animals, while others think that it is important to protect some, not all of them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#animals
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Many people think that we need to make an effort to protect all wild
animals
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whereas
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 some assume only a few genres should be preserved. Personally, I think
animals
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 have
Correct article usage
the rights
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rights
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right
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 to live, so humans need to keep all of them away from danger and extinction. On the one hand, some people do not think it is crucial to protect a certain number of wild creatures. There are many reasons for
this
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.
Firstly
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, it is thought that with several wild
animals
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 existence can become a threat to human life.
For example
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, the CDC has found
out
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apply
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COVID-19 infections in wild
animals
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 like otters, mink and white-tailed deer.
Secondly
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, conserving wild organisms requires a huge amount of money. Inhabitants suppose that these funds should be distributed
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for
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in
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for
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 social issues and humanity problems. Many countries in the world are facing starvation, illiteracy, poverty, unemployment and plague.
On the other hand
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, others assume that the value of protecting all wild
animals
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 can not be overstated. The chief reason is that wild organisms play a vital role in the ecosystem. If Earth did not have various kinds of
animals
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, the ecosystem would be destroyed.
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Moreover
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Moreover,
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 it might cause a
globally
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global
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 natural disaster
for instance
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earthquake
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earthquakes
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,
flood
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floods
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, wildfires, extreme weather events and
drought
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droughts
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. The existence of wild
animals
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 can bring certain benefits to human beings. Scientists can use
animals
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 for medical treatment,
such
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 as experimenting
cosmetics
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with cosmetics
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 on rabbits before exporting the products to the customers. In conclusion, a majority of people support the idea of protecting all wild creatures,
while
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 some suppose a small number of
animals
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 need to be preserved. From my point of view, I totally think we should make an effort to save the whole wild
animals
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 from harm and extinction.
Submitted by nguyenthuytien1609 on

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Task Response
Ensure that the essay fully addresses the prompt and provides a clear position on the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Maintain a consistent logical flow in the essay with clear connections between ideas and paragraphs.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • natural habitats
  • ecological balance
  • biodiversity
  • confinement
  • natural stimuli
  • psychological problems
  • genetic homogeneity
  • environmental changes
  • adapt and evolve
  • survival of the fittest
  • social structures
  • communication patterns
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