Some people say that outdoor activities benefit children's development rather than computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Since the advent of computer games, youngsters have found an alternative to traditional means of play
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
playing outside. Some people believe that playing outside is more beneficial to a child's development.
While
playing on consoles can bring temporary enjoyment, I strongly agree that outdoor activities are more beneficial to a young one's growth.
This
essay will discuss why the positives of outdoor activities far outweigh gaming. Playing outside enhances children's physical health and social skills which are necessary for their growth.
For example
, playing sports or engaging in playground activities helps children develop motor skills, coordination and
overall
fitness.
Additionally
, outdoor play encourages teamwork, communication and social interaction, which are crucial for developing interpersonal skills and building friendships.
Therefore
, playing outside and interacting with pupils is vital for the youth's development On the other, video games have a negative effect on kids' mental and physical health.
For instance
, juveniles who play them have a higher chance of developing a sedentary lifestyle which can lead to obesity and health problems.
Furthermore
, they inhibit contact with people in the real world which leads to social awkwardness and difficulty in forming relationships.
Hence
, spending time hooked to devices and playing has a widely negative impact on the youth's growth. In conclusion,
while
gaming can be a getaway for many young ones to have fun in alternative ways,
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
can have many undesirable outcomes on the normal evolution of a toddler. It is agreed that having real-world experiences is more beneficial to the normal advancement of the youth.
Submitted by James on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Strengthen the introduction with a clearer thesis statement that outlines the main points to be discussed.
logical structure
Use a variety of linking words and phrases to make transitions smoother between ideas and paragraphs.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate more specific examples or case studies to reinforce your points and make your arguments more compelling.
supported main points
You have effectively highlighted the main advantages of outdoor activities for children's development.
logical structure
The essay follows a logical structure with a clear progression of ideas.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and restates your stance on the issue.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • benefit
  • development
  • physical
  • promote
  • foster
  • social skills
  • teamwork
  • cognitive skills
  • problem-solving
  • abilities
  • well-being
  • hinder
  • isolation
  • interpersonal skills
  • sedentary
  • exposure
  • negatively affect
  • academic performance
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!