IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

The leaders or directors of organisations are often older people. Some people think that young people can also be good leaders. Do you agree or disagree?

#leaders #directors #organisations #people
Good leadership can build a good company. Maximum workplaces around, have aged persons in the chair of a leader. But, according to many, young people can not only be efficient but,
also
 can run a company. I completely agree with
this
 statement.
This
 essay will provide justification for
this
 agreement with appropriate examples.
Firstly
, workload needs to be handled carefully in workspaces. The head of any institute is entitled to the distribution of duties to every department. The director is always pressurized with an ample amount of businesses. On one hand, old men, despite having a lot of experience and knowledge in their field, sometimes becomes slow and inactive due to their growing age.
On the other hand
, youngsters with a lot of energy and seriousness
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 can be more productive to the organisation.
For example
, overtime is handled by dedicated bachelors who work past office hours while the elders go home to their families. They miss a lot of festivals and celebrations at home wilfully to finish given tasks.
Secondly
,
transparency
Correct article usage
the transparency
show examples
 of the director is the key to a good relationship with employees as well as clients. Many new trainees feel uncomfortable discussing their problems with their boss.
For instance
, a female
employee-facing
Correct your spelling
employee facing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 menstrual issue, cannot go straight to her senior leader, express the scenario and ask for a day off or leave for a couple of days.
This
 might make the whole situation uneasy. It would have been easy for that person to discuss the matter with a young boss, who tends to be friendly and comforting. To conclude, it can be said that team-leading is better handled by young candidates rather than old people.
Submitted by Arjun on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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