Worker often have to retire at the age of 60 or 65. However, some people say that they should be allowed to continue working for as long as they want. What is your opinion about this?

#worker #age #people

Doing any kind of

sports

, constitutes an important sector in many people’s

life

Replace the word

lives

show examples

, as it represents a recreational activity as well as a

way

exercise

. In

general

Add a comma

,general

show examples

there are

group

sports

such

as basketball, and individual

sports

such

as running. Many people claim that

group

sports

are more beneficial while others have a different point of view. In

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will assess both views and

then

give an opinion. On the one hand, in

sports

that are played in teams,

beside

Replace the word

besides

show examples

the technique

that is

required to play, people have to cooperate with each other in order to perform well all together. In

this

way

, someone can gain a lot not only through

exercise

but

also

through the process of participating in a team, as it promotes the mentality of cooperation and not

competition

Add an article

a competition

show examples

against each other.

Moreover

group

sports

can be a recreational activity, as it is

way

easier to play with friends, something that can motivate someone

begin

Add the particle

to begin

show examples

doing

sports

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

when he can

exercise

and have fun at the same time.

On the other hand

, individual

sports

are

way

easier to do by yourself, something that can be extremely positive if someone does not have a lot of time and needs to organize his own schedule by himself.

Also

beside

Replace the word

besides

show examples

being independent and creating your own

exercise

plan, individual

sports

can be quite beneficial as they help you develop your own character and overcome any obstacles by yourself. Doing a sport alone gives you the opportunity to control everything and understand that only you have the responsibility

Change preposition

for

show examples

your own actions, when in order to achieve something you just need

improve

Fix the infinitive

to improve

show examples

yourself . In conclusion,

group

sports

constitute a

way

of having fun but

also

learning how to cooperate at the same time, while individual

sports

let you be more independent and more focused on yourself. In my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

I would suggest

group

sports

as I believe you gain a lot more by being a part of a team, improving

also

your social skills.

Submitted by mghazya on Sat Dec 25 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

338 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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11 Most Commonly Used English Expressions »

Topic Vocabulary:

retirement age
pension systems
social security
life expectancy
mental and physical well-being
active and engaged
mentorship
knowledge transfer
job opportunities
workforce
physical strength
workplace safety
healthcare costs
accommodation
financial strain

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Worker often have to retire at the age of 60 or 65. However, some people say that they should be allowed to continue working for as long as they want. What is your opinion about this?

Fully explain your ideas

Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent to free time activity of young people. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Being overweight has become a major health concern in many parts of the world. Explain the causes for being overweight and provide solutions.

Discuss the importance of art education in schools. How does exposure to art impact students’ creativity and overall development?

Should education and healthcare be free of charge and funded by the government, or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services?

Some people believe that it is better to live and work in a vertical city with multiple tall buildings, as compared to a horizontal city with fewer tall buildings. Discuss both views and give your opinion.