The rise of convenience foods has helped people keep up with the speed of the modern life style. What are the advantages of this trend? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantage?

#rise #convenience #foods #people #life #style #trend

Nowadays,

people

prefer to eat fast

foods

because they are more available

however

,it has some drawbacks and benefits .In

this

essay ,I will talk about both of them

although

,the disadvantages of these

meals

are more than advantages. In the modern world,many individuals work for long hours and most of them do not have time for cooking at home,they usually eat their

meals

at their workplace or restaurants to save their time.

Additionally

,fast

foods

such

as pizza and burgers are popular among youngsters who eat outside as

Remove the article

apply

show examples

entertainment with their friends.Income in food industries

are

Change the verb form

show examples

one of the crucial

portion

Change to a plural noun

portions

show examples

of money taking.many employees work in factories which prepare and sell

foods

respectively.

Consequently

,some financial problems will be solved in these communities.

For example

,in the US the Macdonald

resturants

Correct your spelling

restaurants

are one of the best

opportunity

Fix the agreement mistake

opportunities

show examples

for

people

who look for

Add an article

a job

show examples

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

On the other hand

,some of these

meals

are oily and salty which are not healthy and lead to some health issues.Heart disease has raised in modern countries

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

to countries

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

consuming

Wrong verb form

consume

show examples

less fast

foods

Fix the agreement mistake

food

show examples

Moreover

,obesity is one of the common health problems in western nations that

Add a missing verb

is related

show examples

to fatty

foods

Additionally

people

's lifestyle changed in families who eat more restaurant

meal

Fix the agreement mistake

meals

show examples

,often they are not at home and do not eat

meals

time

Add an article

a time

show examples

and with their families.For

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

reasons

Fix the agreement mistake

reason

show examples

.eating prepared

foods

have detrimental effects on individuals well-being. In conclusion,in fast pace

world

Add a comma

,world

show examples

individuals are busy with their work or study and

cook

Wrong verb form

cooking

show examples

homemade

meals

are difficult for many which inclined them to eat these unhealthy

foods

.If authorities pay attention to

standardize

Wrong verb form

standardizing

show examples

non homemade

Add a hyphen

non-homemade

show examples

foods

in order to decrease salt and oil in them ,they will be

healther

Correct your spelling

healthier

for citizens.Educating students at schools

improve

Add the particle

to improve

show examples

young

people

knowledgeable

Replace the word

knowledge

show examples

about

foods

Submitted by rezakiannejad on Mon Dec 27 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The way that people work today has changed significantly due to the development of technology. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of these changes.