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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

some people believe that university students should pay all the cost of studies because university education only benefits students themselves not the society as a whole. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #university #students #cost #studies #education #society
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In modern times, there are some individual opinions that
university
students
 should pay all the
fees
 of
studies
 because
university
 education only benefits themselves not the society as a whole.
This
 is a new matter that will lead to serious controversy .
Thus
,
this
 essay will partly disagree with that idea. It is obvious that
students
 would directly benefit because they study for themselves,
therefore
, they must pay all the cost of
studies
.
In particular
, studying at
university
 helps them advance their knowledge and skills for
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 future job. Currently, after graduation, a number of people do not work in
this
 branch which they study so some people assume that
students
 have to take responsibility for
this
 behaviour. When paying all the
fees
 for studying by themselves, they have more motivation to continue studying.
However
, a
students
’ job in the future contributes a part of the economy. It is undeniable that there remain some problems about finances, personal condition, etc that do not allow them to pay
fees
.
Students
 do not have enough abilities to pay all the
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
 of
studies
Correct pronoun usage
their studies
show examples
, especially in the
first
 year.
In
Change preposition
At
show examples
this
 age, they can only work part-time and cannot complete
fees
 or even affect their
studying
Replace the word
studies
show examples
.
As a result
,
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the worst situation,
students
 will drop out of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
 and go to work without any certificate.
Therefore
, they cannot find long term jobs. Some people argue that there are numerous academic branches that are useful for society
such
 as doctors so it will be unequal if
students
 have to pay all
fees
. In conclusion, paying all the cost of
studies
 has several limitations,
therefore
,
university
students
 need some assistance
about
Change preposition
with
show examples
fees
 in school.
Submitted by hoctotnha on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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