Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Modern technology is creating a single world culture. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

When it
terms
Verb problem
comes to
show examples
culture
,
people
will be more similar to each other in the new world.With enhancing media platforms citizens all over the globe introduce their traditional events which help them to know other
cultures
.I agree with
this
statement and in
this
essay talk about the reasons. After the
industrial
Capitalize word
Industrial
show examples
,revolution western
countries
offered their own
culture
to other
people
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
were in far lands.
However
,in recent ,decades individuals
find
Wrong verb form
have found
show examples
the internet as a convenient way that
connects
Wrong verb form
connect
show examples
them around the world.
For example
,
people
from China show their
new year
Correct your spelling
New Year
show examples
dance to others in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
African
countries
which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
them aware of
this
ceremony.
As a result
,
people
will learn about various
cultures
and even choose the strongest ones that are attractive in some ways. I think the government and politicians try to tend their
people
to be at peace with other areas in the world
consequently
,the authorities set up some programs which encourage notions to follow specific
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
show examples
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
.It is a clear policy in Middle Eastern
countries
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
the government like families modify their traditional events to mimic Western
cultures
.
For instance
,we celebrated Christmas in Iran simultaneously with the Western notion.
Also
, paying attention to old traditions is crucial for teaching children to save their national identity . In conclusion,
people
are influenced by other
cultures
for many reasons.
Although
,globalization is one of the important things there are some international concepts that involve families and ministerial organizations to speed up that .
People
and the government should care for
ancestors
Change noun form
ancestors'
ancestor's
show examples
identity
while
trying to open the borders for foreign citizens to be familiar with our
culture
.
Submitted by rezakiannejad on

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task response
The essay addresses the topic and provides relevant examples, but the ideas are not sufficiently clear and comprehensive. The essay lacks a clear focus and the examples provided are not fully developed.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a basic logical structure and includes an introduction and conclusion. However, the progression of ideas within paragraphs and throughout the essay is not always clear. There is a need for more cohesive devices to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.

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