Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

#people #advertisements #products #lives

Since we are living in the era of technology , companies use advertising to introduce their

products

to the public.

However

some people believe that advertisements are not useful ,

others

Correct word choice

and others

show examples

support the idea that these programs can help

customers

Change noun form

customers'

customer's

show examples

lives to be more convenient. In

this

essay, I am going to examine both points of view and

then

I will tell my own opinion. Psychologically, it is true that advertising programs motivate buyers to purchase the items even

they

Correct word choice

if they

show examples

do not want them . The point of prominent companies is to entice their shoppers in various ways and raise their

sell

Replace the word

sales

show examples

for example

, sometimes you can see a product which

Wrong verb form

has been

show examples

produced recently everywhere

such

Change preposition

on Tv

show examples

channels, shopping malls, Billboards

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

etc,

therefore

, you become motivated to buy it and use it because you

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

mentally want to find an experience about that product, so in some ways, you are forced to buy it.

On the other hand

, some citizens like advertising programs ,since they believe they can help us to develop our knowledge about different

products

which are used for the same purposes or they produced recently and we do not have enough information about them.

Also

, it can raise the competition between companies to

rise

Correct your spelling

raise

show examples

their quality as all the shoppers compare their

products

with other materials.

For instance

, when you want to buy soap, you have multiple choices, but you would buy a soap which is recently advertised and you have found more information about it by its advertising. In conclusion,

although

I completely agree with

this

idea that showing off

products

can irritate viewers a lot, they can

also

help them to choose what they need more easily and in

this

way, they do not waste their time .

Submitted by sarahnaeini81 on Thu Dec 30 2021

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coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is weak and lacks a clear introduction and conclusion.

task achievement

The essay partially responds to the task, but it lacks comprehensive development and relevant examples.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

295 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

encourage
persuade
manipulative
unnecessary
excessive
artificial needs
desires
consumers
oversaturation
impulse buying
financial problems
inform
educate
features
benefits
innovations
raise awareness
social issues
positive behavior
enrich
well-being

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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

The workplace nowadays is trying to employ the equal number of females and males. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to decrease the violent crimes in society. What extent Do you Agree or Disagree ??

Do you agree that supermarkets are a threat to small shops and local communities?

Planting trees is very important for the environment. Some people says that trees should be planted in the vacant areas of cities and towns, while other says housing facilities should be build instead. Do you agree or disagree?