IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people say that public sports facilities improve people health problems. Others argue that this development has insignificant effects on public health. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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Sports
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 help to maintain both the physical and mental well being of
people
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. In many ,countries public
sports
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facilities
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 have been well established to improve the quality of
people
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's lives.
However
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, while some
people
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 highly appreciate it, some
people
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 think in a totally different manner about it. Here l am going to discuss both these views in detail. The establishment of public health
facilities
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 directly helps to enhance health. Because
,
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apply
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people
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 can afford all these
facilities
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 without paying for them. Especially, it is an advantage for urban communities.
Moreover
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, it allows
people
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 to spend their free time in a useful way. As well as involved in
sports
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 help them to get rid of their busy lifestyle. Despite that, the availability of public
sports
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facilities
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 helps to allocate time for
sports
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. For example, when someone is free at night he or she can do
sports
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 without any burden.
However
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, some
people
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 think that public
sports
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facilities
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 cause a detrimental impact on public health. Because all these
facilities
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 are easily accessible for anyone, thereby hygienic problems could occur. For ,example public places were not allowed for
people
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 during the corona pandemic. Other than that
people
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 say that those things are not established under the supervision of experts,
therefore
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these equipment
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this equipment
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 can cause harm to the
people
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. As well as there are no coaches to supervise
people
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, and they have to do
sports
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 with their own knowledge. Eventually, l would like to conclude that public
sports
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facilities
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 provide great service to the community,
,
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apply
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Linking Words
however
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,however
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 all these things should be maintained well under the supervision of experts to make it more useful.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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