Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. why do many working people not get enough exercise? what can be done about this problem?

Recent advancements in technology have made
people
tech-savvy.
However
, with growing
technology
Add a comma
,technology
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there comes an increased sedentary lifestyle.
Therefore
,
health
problems are steadily becoming
Correct article usage
a concerned
show examples
concerned
Replace the word
concern
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for the majority of young as well as elderly
people
. Many
people
who work daily get less or no exercise at all during their workday or even in their free
time
which in turn causes myriad
health
problems.
This
essay will discuss why many
people
are not able to cope up with regular exercising and provide an effective
solution
. The major
problem
is that
people
nowadays are not at all concerned about the food that they eat. After
tedious
Correct article usage
a tedious
show examples
working
day
Add a comma
,day
show examples
people
tend to eat all different kinds of junk food
that is
readily available. If
people
would have cooked fresh food in their homes, there would have been diminishing outcomes when it comes to
health
issues. Another reason is that social
media
is growing swiftly and
hence
every individual is busy scrolling through their feed right after work. To cite an example, Instagram, a leading social
media
platform reported that more than 65% of individuals tend to go to bed while scrolling the stories that are posted on their platform. Due to
this
people
get deficient in sleep
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
becoming more attractive to
health
issues and not getting enough
time
to exercise. Since all their
time
for consumed on social
media
.
day
to
Correct your spelling
today
show examples
day
One effective
solution
to
this
problem
can be to put a timer on the leading social
media
apps
such
as
:
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apply
show examples
Facebook, Twitter,
google
Change the capitalization
Google
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and so on.
Instead
of sitting all
day
in a chair/desk,
people
should go for a brisk walk or play some outdoor sports like cricket, football, volleyball. Another
solution
could be to get a personal trainer who will train one's entire family by following an alternate
day
approach.
For instance
, a family of 4 members can hire a professional who can make 2
people
exercise on one
day
and the remaining 2
people
on another
day
.
This
way everyone would feel motivated enough to train which will improve their lifestyle and can live
disease-free
Add an article
a disease-free
show examples
life. To recapitulate, according to the arguments aforementioned above, the
Main
Correct your spelling
main
show examples
reason for
people
not working out is excessive use of social
media
. A
solution
to
this
problem
is to eliminate the use of social
media
to a certain extent and use that
time
to play outdoors or by going gym.
This
will solve the
problem
for the majority of the
people
.
Submitted by Mats Hummles on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Time constraints
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Passive leisure activities
  • Workplace wellness programs
  • Active commuting
  • Subsidized
  • Public awareness
  • Health benefits
  • Incentivizing
  • Accessible public spaces
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