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Band 4.5

Levels of youth crime are increasing rapidly in most cities around the world. What are the reasons for this, and suggest some solutions.

#levels #youth #crime #cities #world
In some parts of the world, the rate of juvenile delinquency is persistently expanding.
This
 is caused by several reasons
includes
Wrong verb form
including
show examples
 media violence and lack of parental attention. There are a number of solutions that should be implemented to deal with teenage crimes. A large number of
youthful
Correct word choice
young
show examples
 people are put into criminal activities. The first reason for
this
 is that violence in media can negatively influence young people’s attitudes and behaviour so that they behave aggressively. Every child has a mobile phone.
However
, they can access everything on the internet which is not beneficial for their learning.
Such
 as violent games and useless programs.
Secondly
, parents’ hectic lifestyle leads to a lack of care for
scion
Correct article usage
the scion
show examples
, which
made
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
 them impossible to control
as a result
 of
this
, those kids having lack support from their family will tend to become stubborn and aggressive.
For example
, By having frequent exposure to films containing sensitive and unsuitable scenes without parental guidance, adolescents are more likely to imitate adverse behaviour,
such
 as assault, rape, and even murder. One of the
solving
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
problems
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
 issue is children spend limited time using social media and parents must set clear guidelines and rules. By doing
this
, young nations are more likely to engage in useful activities and avoid offending crimes. Another way to reduce young offenders is for schools should organize more interesting and involving extracurricular activities for children
are
Correct pronoun usage
who are
show examples
 encouraged
which hobby
Replace the word
such as hobbies
show examples
 and
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
. In conclusion, every kid should have limited access to social networking websites and parents should have an eye on their children. If families follow the above points, the crime rate of
youthful
Correct word choice
young
show examples
 people will in the near future decrease.
Submitted by s.hosein.jeddi.blue on

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coherence cohesion
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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • surge
  • productive activities
  • quality education
  • social media
  • peer pressure
  • economic disparity
  • disadvantaged backgrounds
  • legitimate means
  • inclusive education
  • mentorship
  • community policing
  • youth engagement
  • early intervention
  • constructive pathways
  • social services
  • at-risk families
  • root causes
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