Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

A child

Remove the article

Child

show examples

development is of paramount importance these days.

Children

Use synonyms

should be taught in different ways. While computer games may have some benefits for

children

Use synonyms

, I believe that outdoor

activities

Use synonyms

can have an important role to develop a baby's experts. Becoming familiar with

real life

Add a hyphen

real-life

show examples

would have a primary role for

children

Use synonyms

in the future.

First

Linking Words

of all, facing real situations is a good opportunity for a vast number of teenagers to gain experience. In fact, they can figure out how real-life is, and being in the various situations would be beneficial for them.

In other words

Linking Words

, they may fail in some

activities

Use synonyms

and it may be an excellent time to learn from their mistakes. From a psychological point of view, outdoor

activities

Use synonyms

have significant positive effects on

children

Use synonyms

and they should take full advantage of different occasions so as to be upstanding

people

Use synonyms

for both society and themselves. Learning good communication skills is of utmost importance for

children

Use synonyms

. They can improve

this

Linking Words

skill if they do outdoor movements. Indeed, in

this

Linking Words

regard,

children

Use synonyms

have access to many places that a number of

people

Use synonyms

are there.

As a result

Linking Words

, adolescents,

for instance

Linking Words

, can benefit from meeting other

people

Use synonyms

and develop

this

Linking Words

skill. From a social perspective, these kinds of

activities

Use synonyms

can broaden these folk's horizons as they can become excel at

this

Linking Words

. Possibly, they can gain a sense of satisfaction in life. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

playing computer games might have some advantages, being in society and spending some quality time with other

people

Use synonyms

are far prominent.

armaghan.khosraviSun Jan 02 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Physical development
Overall health
Coordination
Foster
Social skills
Teamwork
Mental well-being
Creativity
Exploration
Strategic thinking
Problem-solving
Hand-eye coordination
Sedentary lifestyles
Social isolation
Moderation
Balanced approach
Detract
Obesity
Poor posture

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?
Cutting-edge technologies have led to the creation of driverless vehicles and during the last decades, these innovative tools have become widely popular due to their positive impacts on societies. From my perspective, I consider that the benefits outweigh the stumbling blocks, and in this essay, I will explain my reasons in detail.
7
band
Some people think health care should be free for everyone. Other think that people should pay their medical cost themselves. Discuss both sides and give your opnion.
There has been an ongoing debate about whether healthcare should be free; proponents argue it would improve access to medical services, while opponents think that patients should cover their own fees. This essay shall delineate both sides' arguments and put forth a balanced opinion.
7.5
band
RWrite a letter to your manager to request setting up a cafeteria for the staff. In your letter, you should tell: what you heard about the inconvenience from the staff how you feel about it what suggestions you have.
Good afternoon, dear Mr. Smith.
8.5
band
You recently bought a piece of sports equipment from an online store. When you first used the piece of sports equipment, you found a problem with it. write a letter to the manager of the online store. In your letter describe the problem with the piece of sports equipment say what happened because of the problem explain what you would like the company to do
I would like to express my dissatisfaction with the sole quality of the ‘Nivea Good Grip Version 2’ badminton shoe that I recently purchased from your website.
8
band
Working long hours causes a great deal of stress and can be very bad for health. The government must find a way to reduce this type of stress. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
Recently, the traditional nine-to-five working hours have been criticized by many governments. They argue that long working hours contribute to stress-related issues and mental health problems. In my opinion, I completely agree that reducing long working hours is the best solution to these problems.

Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think health care should be free for everyone. Other think that people should pay their medical cost themselves. Discuss both sides and give your opnion.

RWrite a letter to your manager to request setting up a cafeteria for the staff. In your letter, you should tell: what you heard about the inconvenience from the staff how you feel about it what suggestions you have.

Working long hours causes a great deal of stress and can be very bad for health. The government must find a way to reduce this type of stress. To what extend do you agree or disagree?