IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people think that it is more important to plant trees in open areas of town and cities than to build more housing . To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In recent years, the rapid expansion of urban areas has sparked a debate about whether it is more crucial to plant
trees
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 in open
spaces
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 within towns and
cities
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 or to construct additional housing to accommodate growing populations.
While
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 I acknowledge the necessity of building more housing, I strongly agree that prioritizing tree planting is of greater importance
due to
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 its significant environmental, health, and social benefits.
Firstly
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,
trees
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 play a vital role in improving
air
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 quality by absorbing pollutants and producing oxygen, which is essential for the well-being of urban residents. In densely populated
cities
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,
air
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 pollution has become a severe issue, leading to respiratory diseases and other health complications. Planting
trees
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 in open areas can help mitigate
this
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 problem by acting as natural
air
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 purifiers.
Moreover
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,
trees
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 contribute to reducing urban heat by providing shade and facilitating evapotranspiration, which is particularly important as climate change continues to intensify heat waves.
Consequently
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,
cities
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 with ample greenery tend to have lower temperatures, making them more livable and reducing the need for energy-intensive
air
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 conditioning.
Additionally
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,
trees
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 offer numerous psychological and social benefits that are often overlooked. Green
spaces
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 have been proven to alleviate stress, promote physical activity, and enhance community well-being.
For instance
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, parks and tree-lined streets encourage outdoor activities and provide
spaces
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 for social interactions, thereby fostering a stronger sense of community.
In contrast
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, the unchecked construction of housing can lead to overcrowded neighbourhoods with limited access to natural surroundings, diminishing residents' quality of life.
On the other hand
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, the need for more housing is undeniable, particularly in
cities
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 facing population surges and affordability crises.
However
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, urban planning should strike a balance by incorporating green
spaces
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 into residential projects rather than eliminating them altogether. Governments and city planners could adopt vertical housing solutions and repurpose underutilized land for development, preserving open areas for greenery. In conclusion,
while
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 the construction of housing is necessary to address urban population growth, I firmly believe that planting
trees
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 should take precedence. The environmental, health, and social advantages of greenery far outweigh the benefits of additional housing, making it imperative for urban planners to integrate more green
spaces
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 into
cities
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.

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task achievement
You have clearly articulated your position on the topic and supported it with well-structured arguments throughout your essay. To improve, you might consider adding more specific examples or case studies related to tree planting and its benefits.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is well-organized, with clear topic sentences and logical progression of ideas. However, to enhance cohesion, consider using more varied linking phrases between your paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
You provide a strong introduction and conclusion, effectively summarizing your main points. Consider restating your key arguments in a slightly different way in the conclusion to reinforce your position more emphatically.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear viewpoint and is well-structured, with a logical flow that guides the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
The environmental, health, and social benefits you mentioned are highly relevant and demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental sustainability
  • biodiversity
  • aesthetic value
  • recreational areas
  • community engagement
  • physical well-being
  • mental health
  • urban planning
  • housing shortages
  • long-term benefits
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