IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

It is important for all towns and cities to have large public spaces such as squares and parks.Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#towns #cities #spaces #squares #parks
In
this
 generation,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 an essential necessity to have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
parks
 and grounds in the cities as well as in the small rural
areas
.I completely agree with the statement to have the gardens and big open
areas
. In every residential
areas
Change to a singular noun
area
show examples
if
parks
 and open
places
 are
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
then
 it will be very beneficial for every age group of people .Because aged persons can go for walking in morning or evening hours.
Next
,
middle age
Add a hyphen
middle-age
show examples
 people and youngsters usually utilise
these area
Change the determiner
this area
these areas
show examples
 for doing exercises ,yoga and
also
 they can spend their quality time with their close ones by visiting the
parks
.
Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
show examples
 children will
also
 go to
parks
 for playing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
games.Everyone likes to
to
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
parks
 because the atmosphere of the
parks
 is totally different from the house.so many different kinds of trees were there and
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of flower trees were
also
 there.These are the reasons that
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 necessary to have the
parks
. Now,we will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the squares and open
places
.In cities or in undeveloped
areas
 if
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
places
 are available
then
 we can utilize the area in many ways
such
 as in
play grounds
Correct your spelling
playgrounds
show examples
 we can play the
criket
Correct your spelling
cricket
 ,football,
badmenton
Correct your spelling
badminton
 and many more.And by seeing the people playing and one will get the encouragement in sports.
In addition
 to
this
,these
places
 are used for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public gatherings and for events and to organise
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
concerts
also
 used .From
this
Add a comma
,this
show examples
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 playground organisation will get the money and it can be used in
maintainance
Correct your spelling
maintenance
 of ground. To
concluded
Change the form of the verb
conclude
show examples
,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 very important to have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
parks
 and grounds.It will be very beneficial for every individual and for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society too.From
this
Add a comma
,this
show examples
 a good environment will create in the society.
Submitted by asma_parveen86 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: