IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many parents encourage young people to leave home when they become older, while others think they should stay at home with the family. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#parents #people #home
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent times, many households are eager to keep their youngsters at home when they become older. In
this
Linking Words
 regard, a number of
people
Use synonyms
 believe that offspring should leave the house when they are at a specific age. The opponents claim that adult
people
Use synonyms
 should stay with their families, but both these arguments need proper scrutiny before reaching a conclusion. On the one hand, leaving home at a young age can be beneficial. If
parents
Use synonyms
 leave their children in an open world, young
people
Use synonyms
 can learn how to survive on their own.
Firstly
Linking Words
, they learn some new skills which are the dispensable part of living alone.
For example
Linking Words
, cooking and taking care of household chores.
Secondly
Linking Words
, they have to pay their living expenses as they are responsible for them on their own.
Finally
Linking Words
, young
people
Use synonyms
 can make decisions for themselves. Independence is not something that only ruins you; it is
also
Linking Words
 something that shows you what you truly are and how capable you are in any circumstances.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, living under one roof may offer the greatest number of opportunities and chances. The main benefit is that young members of the family will be protected by their
parents
Use synonyms
. children could be in danger as they are not wise enough to be able to distinguish between
people
Use synonyms
 who really like them
or
Correct word choice
and
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 who want to deceive them. Another reason for
this
Linking Words
 opinion is that older
people
Use synonyms
 can give advice to young
people
Use synonyms
 at any time, leading to a better relationship between the kinfolks. The
last
Linking Words
 is that
parents
Use synonyms
 have someone to take care of them when they get older, which is not fair to be ignored.
To conclude
Linking Words
, Having considered both sides of the issue, In my perspective, the advantages of staying longer with
parents
Use synonyms
 outweigh the benefits of leaving at an early life.
This
Linking Words
 is because the supportive, secure, and nurturing environment of home can result in children who are more successful.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: