Students in some countries leave school without good understanding of how to manage their money. What do you think are the reasons? What are the solutions to this problem?

It is considered that the majority of students left school without acquiring knowledge of managing their funds which becomes an alarming situation in most of the country.
This
essay will
further
elaborate on the problems along with remedial solutions and
thus
will lead to a logical conclusion. There are myriad of reasons which are expected to
further
explain the argument but the most preponderant one stems from the fact that children who belong to richer families get a hefty amount of pocket
money
which they spend on leisure activities.
For instance
, young people who are frequently going to the cinema, shopping small, eating out at the restaurant and bars with their partners without considering about thrift and
also
indulge in dissipation.
Furthermore
, it results in wastage of
money
and increases environmental pollution. Another pivotal aspect of
this
trend is that scholars are not mature enough in cognitive responsibilities except for doing studies.
As a result
, they do not understand the value of
money
.
In addition
, there are some solutions
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
are not complicated but accessible and practicable.
First
and foremost, there should be fund management subjects to teach students how to manage their personal expenditures.
Moreover
, it is pertinent to mention that parents are supposed to limit the
money
they give their children.
Besides
, local authorities allow part-time jobs so students know the hard work of
money
. To recapitulate, the problem of personal’s fund management facing people all over the world.
Nevertheless
, the potential address discussed helps alleviate
this
concern and
hence
, these are instrumental indeed.
Submitted by aronwang1997 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!