Some people think that we live in a society where money and possessions are given too much importance. Others believe that this is improving our lives. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #society #money #possessions #importance #lives

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There is a group that believes that societies have arrived in an era where people started to give materials importance while other groups think that these tools have made

life

Use synonyms

much easier.

This

Linking Words

essay discusses both sides of the argument, and

then

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I will give my opinion. On one hand, there is a consensus that disagrees that society has arrived at a place where they prioritize possessions.

Furthermore

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, human beings are living in an era where there are gigantic tools for the purpose of making more easier.

Hence

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, these tools are created to enhance the stander of living and minimize the number of our mistakes.

For example

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, humans have the tendency to forget;

therefore

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, developers had created an app to remind us about our important dates.

Moreover

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, these items have bought us more time. To explain, before planes people had to travel for months

on the contrary

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to the present.

On the other hand

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, there is the group that agrees that we have arrived at a stage where we are governed by consumerism. Consumerism has a huge impact on our everyday

life

Use synonyms

For instance

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, the woman that woke up in Tokyo wants a cup of coffee from Starbucks it is the same for the woman who lives in London. Another reason is building our

life

Use synonyms

around materials is an indicator that there is a problem and we have to

tackle

Correct pronoun usage

ittackle

show examples

. In conclusion, I believe that both sides have merits. On balance, it is my opinion that we are dealing with an ethical conundrum.

This

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is because it is my

first

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belief that materials should not be built around our

life

Use synonyms

is because there are other things that are important than possessing money.

Submitted by kofaisal on Thu Jan 06 2022

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

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Some people think that we live in a society where money and possessions are given too much importance. Others believe that this is improving our lives. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You recently moved to a new area. Write to your friend and say - Why did you move there - Describe the new place - Invite him/her to visit you

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

You are soon going to spend three months doing work expericne in an organisation