In many contries, people have health problems because they choose to live in unhealthy ways. What do you think the reasons for this? How can it be solved?

#contries #people #health

In the 21st century, human

life

became more complex and materialistic in nature.

Furthermore

, these enormous changes exert

health

issues and

diseases

in our society .In

this

essay, I will explain the various causes and solutions for these problems.

To begin

, nowadays

people

are busy with their

life

whereby it always promotes unhealthy eating habits like fast food intake and eating large portions of meals in a limited time.

In addition

,these changes are correlated with chronic

diseases

such

as cancer,kidney failure and heart attack.

Moreover

, stressful

life

and unhealthy competition influence our day to day

life

For example

,According to the Indian Institute of Medical Science, 70% of IT professionals in India

facing

Wrong verb form

face

show examples

various

health

and mental problems because of their sleepless and busy

schedule

Fix the agreement mistake

schedules

show examples

.Resultantly, more professional work means less physical exercise

although

, it

generate

Change the verb form

generates

show examples

overweight and posture problems.Another key

things

Fix the agreement mistake

thing

show examples

to remember migration of

people

from rural areas to urban areas creates eminent changes because

people

far

Add a missing verb

are far

show examples

away from agrarian

life

and familiarise

with

Correct pronoun usage

themselves with

show examples

industrial

Add an article

the industrial

show examples

sector. Originally,

this

is the key reason for the beginning of humans dangerous habits and it promotes community

health

diseases

There are

many

Replace the quantifier

much

show examples

mitigating

procedure

Change to a plural noun

procedures

show examples

for the reduction of

unhealthy

Add an article

an unhealthy

show examples

lifestyle

Fix the agreement mistake

lifestyles

show examples

Firstly

, extensive use of homemade vegetarian fresh food

reduce

Change the verb form

reduces

show examples

bad cholesterol and obesity because it stimulates healthy fluids in our body.

Secondly

, balanced

life

promotes physical and mental fitness

although

, it

enhance

Change the verb form

enhances

show examples

people

sleep routine and develop stress relief .

Thirdly

, exercise like cardio, yoga and meditation facilitate positive results in our

life

. To support

this

, recently many

people

all over the world

celebrate

Wrong verb form

celebrated

show examples

yoga day because

people

understand the importance of physical exercise and its relevance in

modern

Add an article

a modern

the modern

show examples

busy

life

. Reportedly, yoga practice

deprive

Change the verb form

deprives

show examples

65% of lifestyle

diseases

diabetic

Replace the word

diabetes

show examples

,cholesterol and blood pressure. In conclusion, there is a saying '

health

wealth

Add an article

a wealth

show examples

of everyone' without

this

treasure no-one can exist.

Therefore

,everybody should preserve their body and mind for keeping prosperous

life

Submitted by sooryag03 on Thu Jan 06 2022

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

316 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many contries, people have health problems because they choose to live in unhealthy ways. What do you think the reasons for this? How can it be solved?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out the history of the building they live in. What are the reason for this? How can people reasearch this?

Some people believe that robots are important for humans to develop while others think that it is a dangerous invention that will impact society negatively.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is often considered that change is more beneficial to people than trying to avoid it and have everything remain the same. Do you think the advantages of change outweigh the disadvantage?

110.Some people believe that nowdays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that school should choose students according to their academic abilities, while others think it is better to have students of different abilities studying together. Discuss both views and state your own opinion.