Living in large cities today poses many problems for people. What are these problems? Should governments encourage more people to live in smaller towns?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Prefer to live in highly developed
cities
cause many problems for
people
. Because It is very much tough to afford all the
expenses
for many
people
. In my opinion,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should lower some of the
expenses
and provide more opportunities to
people
instead
of encouraging them to more in smaller
cities
. Nowadays, the living costs and other
expenses
are getting higher
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each day due to the period of globalisation.
Specially
Replace the word
Especially
show examples
for those
people
who do not own their house as they need to pay higher rent as well to live in the big
cities
such
as Mumbai, Ahemdabad, Bangalore, etc. Apart from that, they
also
need to cover their personal and family's
expenses
from their monthly salary which is quite tough for salaried
people
.
Moreover
, In
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
sectors
Fix the agreement mistake
sector
show examples
, fees are
also
increasing
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every year which is
also
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
major concern for all
middle class
Add a hyphen
middle-class
show examples
families because they
also
need to provide better education to their children.
Government
should set some rules related to rents and
also
lower some
possibily
Correct your spelling
possibly
possible
expenses
such
as fuels, rents, groceries, stationery, etc rather than encouraging
people
to move to undeveloped
cities
because it is
people
's individual choice where to live and where they can get more opportunities because living in small
cities
lower the opportunities in any sector. Apart from that,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should provide more employment growth and set certain rules in increasing salary so that
people
can survive and afford to live in highly developed
cities
. To summarise, living
expenses
are getting increased in highly developed
cities
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
which is unmanaged for most
people
.
However
,
government
shoud
Correct your spelling
should
take certain actions in some of the fields so that
people
can survive in
this
period of globalisation.
Submitted by goswamimanisha403 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: