All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?

the number of people,who are struggling with being overweight has increased all around the globe,which opts its victim from both adults and
also
children.in
this
essay,some radices are explained,while the remedial ideas are uttered too. one of the most highlighted factors has to do with the sedentary lifestyle that technology has bestowed to individuals.which was expected to reduce the hours of work but owing to the comfortability of occupations,its standard has skyrocketed.
in addition
,while used to people burn a multitude of calories by body demanding vocations,the rate of obesity and
also
the associated disease was lower.
furthermore
,emerging of fast foods may be the other contributor,which not only is provided
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a lot of oil but
also
usually lack essential ingredients,
such
as minerals or vitamins,whereas they play a critical role in balancing the body of humans,actually it has been proved by the scientists. to address the issue,not as an insurmountable issue,the participating reasons should be eradicated,
for instance
,if people become aware of their detrimental eating diet,
then
they would monitor the dishes that they consume.either tv or
similarly
the radio can be exploited to broadcast the expert ideas regarding
this
realm.
moreover
by encouraging the population toward exercising can assist the folks to utilise the gotten energies. equipping various parts of cities with free of charge facilities can iron out the problem that nowadays, is dominant in countries around the world. to recapitulate,eradicating the reasons for getting fat can be a positive step to get rid of that by introducing some remedial ideas.
Submitted by drpnima on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Obesity
  • Overweight
  • Epidemic
  • Sedentary
  • Processed food
  • Fast food
  • Nutritional education
  • Awareness
  • Stress
  • Emotional eating
  • Genetic factors
  • Access
  • Healthy food options
  • Marketing
  • Urbanization
  • Lifestyles
What to do next:
Look at other essays: