Some people say that humanitarian subjects such as philosophy, history, and literature that people study in universities have no value for their future career. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your own opinion and relevant examples.

It is believed by some populaces that learning about theory, past events, and languages is not able to bring any benefits to educational institutions
students
.
However
, in my opinion, I completely disagree with
this
argument. The major reason is
students
will lose an opportunity to improve themselves in the right way. Since
,
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learning about history is an essential tool to understand what we
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
done in the past so that
one
Correct pronoun usage
we
show examples
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
do it right in the present.
For example
, if one politician is trying to come up with attractive policies to promote his party
,
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if he educates himself on how his community had been managed in the past, he would come up with better ideas.
Therefore
, humanities couldn't run over the same place, we are all created to develop ourselves, and
the
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knowledge would help us.
Furthermore
, the
subjects
is being
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
part of cultures. To be more specific, humans could live in a community because they have an image of how countries look
like
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show examples
through histories, languages, and ideologies.
Therefore
, if we let universities stop teaching about those knowledge
students
might lose the ability to comprehend how to live in a society.
This
will be a vital reason why they should keep
this
subject in universities.
Moreover
, values should be decided by
students
Correct article usage
the students
show examples
themselves. Education should be something
that is
selected by learners
not
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, not
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observers.
Although
the
subjects
could deliver less valuable knowledge for academic
students
, it is their choice. Learners will earn the most benefits when they acknowledge things they are fond of. At
last
,
students
might derive a large of money after graduation because they distribute new theories that could persuade people. In conclusion,
the
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humanitarian
subjects
have many advantages and society shouldn't cut off the
subjects
by themselves
,
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since they should consider
to
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the learners as well.
Submitted by chdreamzase on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-structured and includes an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in presenting your argument clearly. However, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that your examples are fully developed to strengthen your points further.
general
Some sentences have grammatical inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, which can be improved for better clarity. For instance, rephrase 'humanities couldn't run over the same place' to something more coherent like 'humanities prevent us from making the same mistakes'.
vocabulary
Work on diversifying your vocabulary and sentence structures to make your writing more engaging. For example, instead of repeatedly using phrases like ‘students might lose,’ consider using alternatives like ‘students could miss out on’ or ‘students may be deprived of’.
task response
Your essay clearly disagrees with the argument stated in the prompt and provides reasons to support your viewpoint. This effectively addresses the task requirement.
task response
You did a good job of outlining the importance of humanities subjects such as history in both personal and societal contexts, which supports your argument well.
coherence cohesion
You present a clear introduction and conclusion, which help frame your argument and make your essay easy to follow.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster critical thinking
  • analytical skills
  • human nature
  • crucial in fields
  • cross-cultural competence
  • communication skills
  • superior writing and speaking abilities
  • cultural consultancy
  • historical knowledge
  • cultural awareness
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