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Band 5

In some area of the US, a curfew is imposed in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are accompanied by an adult. What is your own opinion about this?

#area #curfew #teenagers #doors #time #night #adult
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The administration levied strict
rule
Fix the agreement mistake
rules
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 in a few demographic
location
Change to a plural noun
locations
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 of
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 States; vide which they restrict the night outing for adolescents after
specific
Add an article
a specific
show examples
 time. They are permitted to go out in presence of adult members.
This
Linking Words
 restriction has both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
positive and negative
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
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 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers. I strongly support
this
Linking Words
 rule.
This
Linking Words
 essay discusses not only the positive sides but
also
Linking Words
 the dark sides of the same. To start with, students of the
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 ranging from ten to twenty are supposed to work hard for a bright future;
such
Linking Words
 rules may play an imperative role
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 induce them more into
studies
Correct pronoun usage
their studies
show examples
. The
first
Linking Words
 cogent supporting reason is, children, having not much scope to roam around in the late evening hours, will study as a compulsion.
Moreover
Linking Words
, children, of the
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 thirteen to nineteen, are much vulnerable to
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 addicted to any
sorts
Fix the agreement mistake
sort
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 of bad habits. In a survey, it has been seen, those who are free to wander in the evening with their peer
group
Use synonyms
 chance of becoming addicted to drugs is much more than
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
are
Change the verb form
is
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 not permitted.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, teenagers are not allowed to enjoy the evening sky or a
Correct your spelling
quiet
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quite
Correct your spelling
quiet
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 place at late hours. They might not experience the joy of having fun with
the
Change the word
their
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 school friends at the bank of
river
Add an article
the river
a river
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 on a moonlight night.
Furthermore
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, the skill of managing the situation in case of urgency may be hard to grasp.
Although
Linking Words
 all these types of
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
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 may be inculcated
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 later
age
Use synonyms
, the time and ambition which are ruined can never be revived.
This
Linking Words
 is why
such
Linking Words
 a rule is required. To conclude, from the above arguments and example it is vividly clear that
such
Linking Words
law
Correct article usage
a law
show examples
 is preventing a certain
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 from indulging in
wrong
Add an article
the wrong
show examples
 track. The bad influence of peer
Use synonyms
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 is reduced to a great extent as
dark
Correct article usage
the dark
show examples
 hours job target is abolished.
Submitted by sony.bansi on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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