Since traveling abroad has become relatively inexpensive more countries are opening their doors for foreign tourists. Is it a positive or negative trend? Give your opinion and include relevant examples.
It is true that the cost of travelling
becomes
cheaper than the recent years ; Wrong verb form
has become
as a result
, the tourism industry is increasingly growing worldwide . Some people claim that this
is a positive tendency ,while
others argue that there are multiples
adverse consequences of Fix the agreement mistake
multiple
this
trend that should be not ignored .
On the one hand , there are several benefits of the growth of the tourism industry to the nation and the citizens . Firstly
, touristry remains an important source of revenue for the countryside because tourists who come to this
country spend an enormous sum of money in
hotels or restaurants and Change preposition
on
then
the nation benefits from this
money which can be reinvested for the development of some sectors such
as infrastructure , education , funding etc . Secondly
, the growth of the touristry industry allows the majority of a country's population to be employed . For example
, many of persons work in hotels , restaurants , tour companies and car rental agencies .
On the other hand
,the growth of this
business also
brings some negative effects to the country. As more visitors are coming to the countryside, more tourist attraction places are then
built. Many of these places are made in nature conservation areas, whereas
some wild animals would lose their natural habitat and bring negative impact
to the ecosystem as well. Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
In addition
, some visitors also
bring negative behaviours that affect the local culture. For instance
, smoking and drinking alcohol .Consequently
, endangering culture, tradition
could be done from the excessive presence of foreign tourists and that could be a detrimental fact.
In conclusion, despite that tourism brings several benefits to the nation , it would be not ignored that it has multiple negative consequences Correct word choice
and tradition
such
as pollution and the endangering of the local culture.Submitted by elgalalafatimazahra on
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task achievement
Try to avoid minor grammatical mistakes, such as misusing semicolons or incorrect verb tenses. For example, 'travelling becomes' should be 'travelling has become.'
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points better. For instance, name a country that has benefited significantly from tourism or a specific natural area adversely affected by tourism.
coherence cohesion
Improve the transition between paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay. For instance, use transition phrases like 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' or 'On the contrary.'
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single clear idea, and that ideas are clearly linked to the main argument. Avoid jumping between different points too quickly.
task achievement
The essay effectively addresses both positive and negative aspects of increased tourism, providing a balanced view on the topic.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-structured, providing a clear overview of what the essay will discuss and summarizing the main points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph addresses a specific aspect of the topic, making it easier to follow the argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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