Some people believe that it is the government’s responsibility to provide care and finance to support people after they retire. Others, however, think that individuals themselves should save money in their own when they are old. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #government’s #responsibility #care #finance #support #individuals #money

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In return to people’s devotion during the labour age comes

opinion

Correct article usage

the opinion

show examples

that government should subsidize them after retirement.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, many support individuals self-charged to avoid burden to society.

Although

Linking Words

both views appear reasonable, I honestly believe governors must take

care

Use synonyms

of old people Those who assert that it is individuals charged to take

care

Use synonyms

of themselves indicate the mitigation of

financial

Add an article

the financial

show examples

burden. In simple words, as the life expectancy escalated gradually, countries with rapidly

aging

Change the spelling

ageing

show examples

populations must allocate more money and resources to their health

care

Use synonyms

systems.

Consequently

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

disproportionate amount of money substantially increased the burden on governments' budgets, which resulted in the collapse of existing funding to tackle pressing issues like the housing crisis or disease pandemic. A well-known example includes India, where a surge in welfare and publicly funded programs hinder existing systems from handling the growing prevalence of chronic diseases while

also

Linking Words

addressing the needs of large and expanding senior populations.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, a leading cause to deny

this

Linking Words

argument is the reimbursement for retirees' perseverance during their

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

age. Norway's high welfare payments are a salient example of high taxation returns in generous public assistance. At

this

Linking Words

place, people enrich the national budget by devoting their time and effort to the country's development, meaning that citizens contribute to taxes raised. The authorities can distribute these taxes

further

Linking Words

to develop their country,

such

Linking Words

as building hospitals, upgrading infrastructure, and paying for officials. The result is that by way of compensation for old contributors' devotion in their youth, money-related assistance and

care

Use synonyms

services are introduced to the elderly,

for example

Linking Words

, free-of-charge health checkups or retirements home. It implies that governments’ subsidies provision appears acutely pivotal as recompense for

labor’s

Change the spelling

labour’s

show examples

dedication. In recapitulation, even though the personal accumulation alleviates the strain on public funding, it cannot disclaim the urge to

equipped

Wrong verb form

equip

show examples

senior civilians with proper welfare programs in response to their determination.

Thus

Linking Words

, it is necessary to grant

elderly

Correct article usage

the elderly

show examples

an expense to meet demands on leisure and healthcare systems at their retirements

Submitted by thanh.jenny on Sat Jan 15 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

333 words

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Some people believe that it is the government’s responsibility to provide care and finance to support people after they retire. Others, however, think that individuals themselves should save money in their own when they are old. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people think that children should not watch television, because it has negative effects, while others believe it helps children. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their families. Others believe that this is unnecessary or even negative. Discuss the possible arguments on both sides, and say which side you personally support.

Many employers believe that good social skills are as important as good qualifications to succeed in a job, so they are employing people who are with good social skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part In organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.