IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

An increasing number of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages for both individuals and companies to shopping online?

#people #individuals #companies
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays with easy access to the internet, many
people
Use synonyms
 purchase what they looking for by using different online platforms. There are different positive sides to that,
however
Linking Words
, some drawbacks that affect not only the individuals but
also
Linking Words
 the business should be taken into consideration.
First
Linking Words
 of all, going online and buying different products is more convenient
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 as they can make orders from any shop locally or even globally while they are sitting in their sofas and having their favourite meals.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, customers may arrange a suitable time for the delivery time as well.
As a result
Linking Words
 of that, it will definitely make them feel more comfortable and pleased. One more thing is getting a huge discount when a customer buys online a large variety of products even if not needed, So buyers will never miss
this
Linking Words
 opportunity.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are some minuses that would affect the workers as well as the companies. Most importantly, it might reduce the need for the workers inside the different shops as
people
Use synonyms
 will tend to use online shopping for their demands.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it will affect the economy by increasing the unemployment levels.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, many companies will start shutting down multiple branches in the different markets as they just need one large warehouse to deliver the products to customers with limited employees. From the above mentioned, it can be concluded that online shopping might bring certain benefits to customers
such
Linking Words
 as comfortability and pleasure.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 there are some drawbacks that we should be aware of like the increased levels of unemployed
people
Use synonyms
 and
closure
Correct article usage
the closure
show examples
 of many small businesses.
Submitted by dr.turkials3don on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: