Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

From a rising of new inmates each passing year, it is easily seen that a large number of them enter prison in their teenage years. Interestingly, the majority of them reported having regret about their activities in the past. There is an argument whether teenagers should be guided regarding the dangers of committing a crime in order to prevent them from making a wrong decision. In my perspective, it is definitely good to provide guidance as children at
this
age is easily influenced both negatively and positively. 
First
of all, it is undeniable that guidance for juveniles is an important element to successful adulthood. Role confusion and uncertainty of the future are the primary factors contributing to the problem especially in lower-income households. For illustration, in most lower-income households, parents need to work hard to earn money support for the whole family.
As a result
, children are left alone most of the time, without adults advisement, they are recruited into the local gangs with a promise of easy money and job security.
Consequently
, small crimes like stealing from teachers turn to homicide.
This
can be easily prevented if there is someone telling them that
this
is wrong.
On the other hand
,
this
situation is like a two-sided sword having good advisors mean a better future,
likewise
, having bad ones potentially
resulting
Add the preposition
inresulting
show examples
severe adverse effects.
Therefore
, trusting one certain person is quite risky.
For example
, a con theif disguised to befriend and encourage a child to assist in a scheme to trick others. In order to prevent
this
situation, adults especially family members should be role models and act as advisors, meanwhile, maintaining a friendly relationship so juveniles are more at ease to discuss with family members about everything. In conclusion, being an inmate is not a guarantee that an individual is wicked, actually, a lacks
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
supervision is to blame for a wrong path. Evidently, having someone for juveniles to turn to for advice can be a big change to set them on the correct path.
However
, those who are responsible need to be good models
first
to ensure the effectiveness of the intervention.
Submitted by petchlada.yaovapak on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • prisoners
  • rehabilitation
  • recidivism
  • consequences
  • insights
  • deterrent
  • guidance
  • support
  • role models
  • positive change
What to do next:
Look at other essays: