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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyle in the countryside. Others believe that there are health benefits of living in cities. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

#people #lifestyle #countryside #health #cities
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Some of the public believe that living in the
countryside
Use synonyms
 is beneficial for getting a healthy lifestyle. The others suppose that there are more positive aspects when they are
city
Use synonyms
 residents.
Linking Words
This
Correct determiner usage
The
show examples
 following essay will show both views and which opinion
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
I agree with. It is obvious that living in the
countryside
Use synonyms
 is a great idea for people who prefer peaceful and fresh life. Because of the small population in the rural areas, there could be less pollution than living in the
city
Use synonyms
. But the most concerning issue is the underdevelopment of
health
Use synonyms
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
, which is one of the most important elements of a community.
Although
Linking Words
 the environment in the
countryside
Use synonyms
 is clean, there are some particular diseases which are dangerous for society.
In addition
Linking Words
, the knowledge of
healthcare
Use synonyms
 is not properly popular in the
countryside
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, in the early period of
Covid-19
Correct article usage
the Covid-19
show examples
 pandemic, some regions were in danger because the civilians had little information about the virus.
Thus
Linking Words
, I do not find that it is easier to get healthier in the
countryside
Use synonyms
. There are a lot of arguments that
city
Use synonyms
 life is beneficial for human’s
health
Use synonyms
.
First
Linking Words
, there are a huge number of
healthcare
Use synonyms
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
 in the urban areas, so it is easy to find a place that citizens can come to when they have any
health
Use synonyms
 problems. Because of modernization, citizens now can access
healthcare
Use synonyms
 systems conveniently. The information network is available in each
city
Use synonyms
 so that the community can access up to date
healthcare
Use synonyms
 knowledge earliest.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, people can join in recreational activities which are rare in the
countryside
Use synonyms
 as a way to improve their mental
health
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, in my viewpoint, it is beneficial to get a healthy lifestyle in the
city
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 there are some drawbacks in the urban region, we can prevent
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
 many ways to
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
 our
health
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by hoangthanhnam.dav on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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