IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

many museums charge for admission while others are free. doyou think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweight the disadvantages?

#museums #charge #admission #doyou #people #outweight
The issue of charging
museum
 visitors has grown in importance over the past few decades.While there may be some disadvantages to charging people for admission,I personally believe that the merits are far more.
To begin
 with,It is obvious that the maintenance of a
museum
 is very costly and highly important.
Therefore
,
museums
 simply need
this
 money to preserve the artefacts in a good condition and
this
 is vital for them to do so.It has shown that many free
museums
 have lost their quality and popularity over the years because the condition of their
museums
 reduced over time.From a psychological point of view, research findings confirm that when visitors pay for their exploration through a
museum
, they are more aware of the value of the place that they are visiting and
this
 affects their appreciation of the exhibits.
Besides
,
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 charges can play a vital role in expanding a
museum
. With
this
money
Add a comma
,money
show examples
 they are able to add more interesting items and features to attract more people.
For instance
, our local history
museum
 in the city has equipped with virtual reality goggles so you are able to see some short videos about every section that you are visiting.Another interesting feature is on their website that simulates inside of
museum
Add an article
the museum
show examples
 and it is like you are visiting from home very easily.
Thus
, these actions are fascinating and convenient for the audience. In conclusion, due to the fact that these charges are the only source of revenue for
museums
,I think it is crucial for
museums
 to charge visitors so as to keep up with their expenses and expand their work.
Submitted by banan_reza on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: