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Band 5

People living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. What are those problems? Should the government encourage people to move to regional towns?

#people #cities #face #life #government #move #towns
There is no doubt that these days many
people
 who live in the big cities face a
lot
 of difficulties in their daily life. The question is, what are these difficulties and should encourage
people
 to live in regional
towns
? In
this
 essay, I am going to discuss
that problems
Change the determiner
that problem
those problems
show examples
 and draw my own conclusion. In terms of the problems of
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
large
towns
, a
lot
 of
people
 suffer from poor conditions in cities. The main reason given to support
this
 claim is crowded streets. To illustrate,
people
 need to wake up early to go to their jobs to avoid the crowded. Another reason is
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
 of jobs.
In other words
, it is hard to find a job after graduation. A recent study showed that 60% of individuals who live in the
towns
 are unemployed. According to that, many
people
 face a
lot
 of problems in their life.
However
, governments should encourage their citizens to
living
Change the verb form
live
show examples
 in the regional
towns
 through
provide
Change the verb form
providing
show examples
 many benefits.
Firstly
, they can raise
salaries
Correct article usage
the salaries
show examples
 of city workers.
In other words
,
number
Change the article
the number
show examples
 of unemployed citizens will decrease, and
people
 will be excited to live in
towns
.
Secondly
, living in the town will help individuals to get enough sleep, where do not required
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
 them
wake
Fix the infinitive
to wake
show examples
 up early to avoid the crowded.
This
 is because
small
Add an article
the small
show examples
 distance between places. In conclusion, it is evident that living in the greater
towns
 have a
lot
 of difficulties, so should be motivated
people
 to live in the
towns
. government must ensure steps are taken to prevent
this
 phenomenon from deteriorating future.
Submitted by besho0h on

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