IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people argue that we should respect the culture and tradition of place where we migrate

#people #respect #culture #tradition #place
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Since the origin of homosocial,
people
Use synonyms
 have been migrating (travelling) to different parts of the
world
Use synonyms
 in search of greener pastures. In
such
Linking Words
 a scenario cultural differences become a moot issue, where respecting
culture
Correct article usage
the culture
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 and tradition of
host
Correct article usage
the host
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 country seems to be
pragmatic
Add an article
the pragmatic
a pragmatic
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 solution and the reasons for my inclination are articulated in
Correct article usage
the trail
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trail
Correct your spelling
trial
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 paragraph.
Linking Words
First
Correct article usage
The first
show examples
 and foremost reason that supports my ideology is that respecting the host country’s
cultural
Replace the word
culture
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 elevates cultural conflicts even a minor miss understanding could result
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 fierce battle agony, owing to
Linking Words
such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
reasons
people
Use synonyms
 should adopt
culture
Correct article usage
the culture
show examples
 and
tradtion
Correct your spelling
tradition
 of the country where
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 migrate. Another major positive is that
people
Use synonyms
 would
be easily mingle
Change the verb form
be easily mingling
be easily mingled
show examples
 with local
people
Use synonyms
,
eventually
Add a comma
,eventually
show examples
 they would be able to enjoy diversity into cultural traditions and other aspects of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life. To cite an example, rice and curry
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 become a national dish of the UK
instead
Linking Words
 of fish and chips, Christmas is celebrated by
people
Use synonyms
belong
Wrong verb form
belonging
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 to different ethnicity and yoga has become a part of human’s life. These are
paragon
Add an article
a paragon
the paragon
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 of
such
Linking Words
 cases.
Last
Linking Words
 but not the least, both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
groups are able to overcome cultural differences,
consequently
Linking Words
 it
lessen
Change the verb form
lessens
show examples
 the chances of war in
scenario
Add an article
a scenario
the scenario
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 where the
world
Use synonyms
 has already
witness
Wrong verb form
witnessed
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 catastrophic two
world
Use synonyms
war
Fix the agreement mistake
wars
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, it
is believe
Change the verb form
is believed
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 that
human
Correct article usage
the human
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 race should avoid cultural conflicts by respecting each other’s culture and tradition. Agglomerating all the points elaborated above, it can
be conclude
Change the verb form
be concluded
show examples
 that in the
world
Use synonyms
 of globalization, adapting to
Add an article
the life
a life
show examples
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
 of the country of migration has become
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
Correct your spelling
reality
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realty
Correct your spelling
reality
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in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
today.
Submitted by heyakshatshah on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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