Some people believe that money makes life comfortable. Others think that a large amount of wealth brings more troubles. Do the advantages of having a lot of money outweigh the disadvantages?

It is believed by some that
comfortable
Correct article usage
a comfortable
show examples
lifestyle is possible with
wealth
; others,
however
, consider
money
to be a source of hardships and plights in life. Financial stability is advantageous because it allows
people
not only to afford
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
standard of essential necessities but
also
helps them to enjoy
luxuries
Correct article usage
the luxuries
show examples
of life.
Although
the rich always have increased security risks, the benefits of economic strength are far more significant. The blessing of
wealth
enables
people
to get
high
Add an article
a high
the high
show examples
standard of basic needs.
For instance
, healthcare and educational facilities offered by private sectors are often excellent as compared to the governmental departments. In order to afford these private services a big amount of
money
is needed.
Similarly
, for having a lavish lifestyle, excess
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money
is required to bear the expenses.
Therefore
, the elite class is entitled to enjoy luxury accommodations, new models of posh cars and
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
electronic gadgets because of their assets and bank balance. These are
importance
Replace the word
important
show examples
benefits of
wealth
.
On the other hand
,
upper
Add an article
the upper
show examples
class in a society is always vulnerable to safety issues.
This
is because of the fact that they are more prone to burglary, theft and robbery as they have plenty of financial resources to attract criminals.
Thus
,
wealth
endangers the safety of
people
; so, they often require security guards to protect themselves and their finances. In conclusion, despite the security threats to the rich
people
and their belongings,
money
is a key factor to afford necessities and luxuries for the sake of a better standard of living.
Hence
, the benefits of
wealth
outweigh its drawbacks.
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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • assets
  • investment
  • quality of life
  • employment opportunities
  • healthcare
  • freedom
  • philanthropic activities
  • stress and anxiety
  • financial status
  • trust issues
  • jealousy
  • privacy
  • scrutiny
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