Out of a country’s health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and prevention measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#country’s #health #budget #proportion #treatment #education #prevention #measures

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The given table charts demonstrate the number of men and women, who lived in the Republic of Freedonia,in 6 different categories during

20_year

Correct article usage

the 20_year

show examples

period. From an overall perspective, females were far behind

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

men in all sectors in 1975.

Although

Linking Words

,in 1995,they made a significant growth especially in Communication, Wholesale and retail trade. As can be presented in the

first

Linking Words

diagram,males were predominant in 6 employment fields.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the highest proportion

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

related to Public Sector (non_defence) with 850000 members and 700000 individuals for Manufacturing, Wholesale and retail trade.

In addition

Linking Words

, the rest of the chart

was fluctuated

Change to the active voice

fluctuated

has fluctuated

show examples

between 25000 and 42000. A close look at a

second

Linking Words

graph reveals that the employment industry of Freedonia saw a noticeable change and it can be understood that the quantity of female

employee

Fix the agreement mistake

employees

show examples

grow in the time of 20 years.Women went ahead of men in

Communications

Correct article usage

the Communications

show examples

and Wholesale sectors.

Besides

Linking Words

that,it can be seen the small gaps in Finance/Banking and Public segment (defence). By the way,boys overtook in other sections.

Submitted by ghafooriarya on Sat Jan 29 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

163 words

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Out of a country’s health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and prevention measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think women should be allowed to join the army, the navy and the air force just like men

Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but other people claim that it is the individual’s responsibility. Discuss both the views and give your opinion?

Many citites around the world are facing severe traffic congestion problems. what are the main causes for this issue and what solutions can be implementedt to solve it ?

Studying with a group of students in a classroom is more beneficial than learning online at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?