Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #health #sports #facilities #effect #measures

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Recently,

health

Use synonyms

problem particularly caused by live style is the most important issue which

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

resolve

Wrong verb form

resolved

show examples

. Some

people

Use synonyms

believe that the most effective way to improve

citizen

Use synonyms

health

Use synonyms

is by developing sports

facilities

Use synonyms

massively, while others say that

these programme

Change the determiner

this programme

these programmes

show examples

provide little impact and need another alternative. In my opinion,

this

Linking Words

measurement has

non-significant

Correct article usage

a non-significant

show examples

Replace the word

effect

show examples

affect

Correct your spelling

effect

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

public

health

Use synonyms

wide

Add an article

a wide

show examples

range of

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

show examples

;

however

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

essay will explore both

aspect

Change to a plural noun

aspects

show examples

discussion

Add an article

the discussion

show examples

First

Linking Words

and foremost, increasing the number of sports

facilities

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as jogging track, mainstream field, and other specific

arena

Change the wording

arenas

show examples

are

Change the verb form

show examples

beneficial to enhance public

health

Use synonyms

in Indonesia. By providing

this

Linking Words

venue,

Use synonyms

Add an article

a citizen

the citizen

show examples

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

will

able

Add a missing verb

be able

show examples

to express their interest in any sort of

exercise

Use synonyms

freely without limitation.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the development of public

health

Use synonyms

is extremely beneficial.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

facility concentrates in the city centre; it rarely develops in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

remote area, so

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the government should formulate

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

other effective solutions. The essential programmes that must be conducted by the authority are not only from

facilities

Use synonyms

but

also

Linking Words

encourage individual spirit as well as provide

health

Use synonyms

checker to give an alert of warning.

Instead

Linking Words

of doing

exercise

Use synonyms

public

Add an article

a public

show examples

facility

Fix the agreement mistake

facilities

show examples

, it is more effective and efficient if

people

Use synonyms

conduct their

workout

Fix the agreement mistake

workouts

show examples

at home. They can utilize any

kinds

Fix the agreement mistake

kind

show examples

of house equipment

such

Linking Words

as stones,

woods

Fix the agreement mistake

wood

show examples

, or even sand to create

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

exercise

Use synonyms

tools.

Moreover

Linking Words

, in order to anticipate the late measurement

such

Linking Words

Add the preposition

foras

show examples

overweight and over, the government should actively provide

initial

Correct article usage

an initial

show examples

health

Use synonyms

checker that can easily find by

Use synonyms

Add an article

a citizen

the citizen

show examples

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

, so that they can understand their

health

Use synonyms

level before it

getting

Wrong verb form

gets

show examples

worse. In conclusion, providing several sports

facilities

Use synonyms

are beneficial for only a part of

Use synonyms

citizen

Add an article

a citizen

the citizen

show examples

who

Add a missing verb

are close

show examples

Change the verb form

closes

show examples

to the venue, while

people

Use synonyms

remote

Add an article

a remote

show examples

area are difficult to reach them. I would advise the ministry of

health

Use synonyms

of the Republic of Indonesia to focus on educating

people

Use synonyms

for

Change preposition

about

show examples

daily

exercise

Use synonyms

at home and providing

health

Use synonyms

checker

Fix the agreement mistake

checkers

show examples

as a preventive action.

Submitted by panderino12 on Sun Jan 30 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

323 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

public health
sports facilities
physical activity
exercise
chronic diseases
heart disease
obesity
inclusivity
participation
safe environment
social interaction
community engagement
comprehensive approach
health education programs
environmental factors
healthcare infrastructure
quality healthcare services
public health initiatives

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
The crime rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries. Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions.
In the midst of change , the crime rate is increasing at an alarming rate which is very concerning to society. The most surprising thing to notice is that young people are more involved in crimes in the present scenario . there is a plethora of reasons behind why youngsters are more into crime such as lack of good parenting , social mediation effect of peers and many more . In the succeeding monograph , the main agenda is not only to delve into the setbacks as well as possible remedies to curb this menace
7
band
In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehiceles outweigh the disadvantages?
All vehicles including cars,buses and trucks will not need drivers to be controlled in the future. People just as passengers will be in these vehicles during trips. While it is argued that this trend may have negative points, I firmly believe that the positive points would overshadow them.
7
band
There are more new towns nowadays, it is more important to include public parks and sports for individuals to spend their free time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In today's contemporary and constantly developing life, a number of cities are experiencing the construction of brand-new innovations, such as parks and sports grounds. I profoundly give credence to the aforementioned idea of establishing more such types of societal attractions, in the sense of devoting many people's time there to enhance their health in conjunction with the evolving aggregate position of infrastructure in a city.
4.5
band
When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what extent, do you agree or disagree?
It's true that factors like income is their top priority when people are considering to look for work. I completely agree with this view.
5
band
You are preparing an event in the countryside. Write a letter to your friend and ask for help with the arrangements. What the event is. Why the event is being held? What arrangements have already been made? How your friend can help?
I am writing an invitation of my sister's wedding in my home town.

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The crime rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries. Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehiceles outweigh the disadvantages?

There are more new towns nowadays, it is more important to include public parks and sports for individuals to spend their free time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

When choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration. To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

You are preparing an event in the countryside. Write a letter to your friend and ask for help with the arrangements. What the event is. Why the event is being held? What arrangements have already been made? How your friend can help?